My goal with this deck is to hit a score of 666. I'm interested to see what happens then. Maybe it will open an extradimensional portal to the underworld and a lich will pour hot soup on my head. That should be fun.
The idea of the deck is simple. Get out a creature (Phylactery Lich is best). Equip with
Hot Soup
Darksteel Axe
, Inquisitor's Flail, or Lashwrithe. Commence beating up opponent.
CREATURES
Phylactery Lich: This is one of the most efficient creatures ever. A 5/5 indestructible for 3 mana is good, to say the least. We have 10 one- or two-mana artifacts (I'm not including Vault Skirge here), so you can reliably drop him turn 3.
Vault Skirge: This guy drops on turn one and gains life back fast, especially if you get a couple of Equipment on him. It can get out of control fast.
Gatekeeper of Malakir
: He serves the dual purpose of both beating people up and eating creatures. It doesn't really need to be said, but you should kick him. All the time.
Vampire Nighthawk: Functions like extra copies of Vault Skirge, but also blocks like a champ. Puts you out of the reach of aggro decks with lifegain very quickly.
Blood Scrivener
: I needed a good two-drop, and this guy fit the slot nicely. With the mana curve of the deck being pretty low, you can empty your hand pretty quickly and get him drawing you extra cards.
Herald of Torment
: Another versatile dude, he's great an enchanting a Lich. I mean, who doesn't like an 8/8 flying indestructible?
Lashwrithe: This drops as a 4/4, every time, and only gets bigger as the game goes long. Plus, it can work as a later-game phylactery if need be.
The numbers on the creatures may need some tweaking, I'm not sure I like all the two-ofs.
EQUIPMENT
Darksteel Axe
: If I were to put my soul somewhere, I'd put it in one of these. The current model comes with a lifetime warranty, and since it houses my soul, that life is going to be a long time. It also has great math, since it puts every one of our creatures to what I call "critical power". That is, it drops the number of actual swings you have to make to win the game. 1 (20 swings), 2 (10 swings), 3 (7 swings), 4 (5 swings), 5 (4 swings), 7 (3 swings), 10 (2 swings), and 20 (1 swing) are the critical powers. Let me know if this concept makes sense, I can explain it better if need be.
Hot Soup
: So you've got a 5/5. Why not make it unblockable? The drawback from Soup is negated by indestructible, and the image of a powerful lich running around with a cauldron full of soup is just too funny to pass up.
Inquisitor's Flail: Phylactery Lich is indestructible, and lots of our other creatures have 1 toughness. Why not double their damage? This on a Lich puts your opponent on a two-turn clock, which is tough to work around.
Lashwrithe: It's back! One of the best ways to curve out in this deck is Axe, Scrivener, Lich, Writhe. You equip the Writhe and swing immediately, getting in for 9 with just the Lich. On turn 4, that can be game. It's also a creature, so it's just strong.
REMOVAL
Tragic Slip: I'm just trying this out, but I think it has some potential. The less mana I use, the more I have left over for equip costs.
Victim of Night: Always a good spell. Hits almost everything for 2 mana.
Gatekeeper of Malakir
: Again with this guy! He's fantastic.
SUPPORT
Sign in Blood: Drawing cards is just so good, and there aren't all that many other turn-2 plays.
Read the Bones: See above, but added for topdecking mode. A 3/1 split with Sign in Blood seems to work pretty well.
Blood Scrivener
: Ditto.
Leave me a comment with your suggestions; I'll consider anything.* I mean, heck, when your weapon of choice is a pot of
Hot Soup
, you know you're desperate. Right now I'm looking for a good two-drop. I'm testing
Blood Scrivener
now, and the list of cards I'm looking at is in the maybeboard. Also considering Prowler's Helm over
Hot Soup
. Not as fun flavor-wise, but probably stronger. Thoughts?
*Exception: Nykthos, Shrine to Nyx and Cabal Coffers have already been mentioned. Those don't do anything for me until turn turn four at the earliest, and they're completely dead before then. They're too slow and I don't have anything really big to dump all that mana into.
