Where to begin? (its a long story):
deck-large:Most entertaining deckOne day there was this female Dragon Broodmother sitting on a
Copperline Gorge
, who by chance met this hansom dragon named Karrthus, Tyrant of Jund. The chemistry between them started to spark and their relationship grew. Karrthus, Tyrant of Jund had a
Soul's Majesty
presence to him, he naturally would draw her in. Together they would fly over the Mountain and Forest, and cuddle in a hidden Swamp day and night. They fell madly in love together, and eventually ended up having a child together. You could tell this baby
Predator Dragon
took after his father, they both like to make haste when they eat. Life was good for the three dragons, the Dragon Broodmother was happy because she finally had a family of her own.
But slowly fatherhood started to make Karrthus, Tyrant of Jund feel trapped, like so many male dragons before him. He did what all male dragons like too do in that situation, he up and left the Dragon Broodmother for other female dragons. Naturally, the Dragon Broodmother was pregnant when he left and would be spitting out his bastard children ever since. Dragon semen is pretty strong apparently!
While the Dragon Broodmother was pregnant she had to find a place to lay her eggs. She noticed some Birds of Paradise flying around in this Rootbound Crag, so she settled at a near by Mountain. She thought if its good enough for the birds that are so fragile, then it would be good enough for her babies. So she tried to give this new place a try, but this
Stomping Ground
had something else that also lived here. Goblins!
These group of goblins were lead by a powerful goblin named Mogg War Marshal, he was known to be persistent in his attacks. When ever a goblin died in a war, he would send another in its place to keep fighting. So a new war began between the goblins and the Dragon Broodmother! Constant fighting ensued, a lot of goblins would get eaten. Eventually, the Dragon Broodmother gave birth to a dragon that had a particular taste for goblins. This dragon was so good at eating goblins that its only appetite would eventually be only for goblins, the goblins named this dragon the
Voracious Dragon
. Because of so many goblin deaths, the goblins had to increase the size of their Woodland Cemetery by a lot.
So life started to settle for the Dragon Broodmother until by chance she met a handsome young dragon named the Scourge of Valkas. This young dragon was very muscular and sweet to the Dragon Broodmother, he woed her with gifts of Eldrazi Spawn for her bastard children. She was so easily impressed, for she had never seen Eldrazi Spawn before. Little did she know that the Scourge of Valkas was stealing these little hell spawns from a near by Awakening Zone, he thought goblins were too much work to catch and deliver. Its so sad how young female dragons can be so easily tricked and blissfully ignorant.
Like most male dragons, the Scourge of Valkas knew to seal the deal he would have to marry the Dragon Broodmother if he ever wanted to mate with her. So he took her to this Verdant Catacombs and made a Grave Pact with her. You can't exactly put a ring on a dragons finger, so some sort of deal was as close as he was going to get. He vowed that if anything happened to him, her, or her children then all who where around would also feel the pain of losing a loved one. Sweet words really, considering this is coming from a dragon. She finally sad yes, he had to ask a couple of times for the shock had gotten to her. And so the Dragon Broodmother and the Scourge of Valkas enjoyed married life for a while. Unlike her last marriage to Karrthus, Tyrant of Jund, this marriage was good. The Scourge of Valkas was a good father for the most part, he just had one little problem. He liked to drink.
This kind of makes you wonder what are the drinking limits of a dragon, how do dragons hold their liquor? Well it turns out the Scourge of Valkas could not hold his own when it came to drinking, as a result he would often lose his temper. Every time the Dragon Broodmother would give birth to a dragon the Scourge of Valkas would wonder which bastard was his. Did it belong to him or Karrthus, Tyrant of Jund? This made him so angry that his temper would grow exponentially and he would throw fire every where, no one was safe when he got angry. He just could not let it go that he was getting sloppy seconds because of Karrthus, Tyrant of Jund. Eventually, he ended up drinking himself to death and died of liver failure a couple centuries later. The Dragon Broodmother could always tell which bastard belonged to which father. The sons of Scourge of Valkas showed similar temper when they would devour food, they would often seize their prey from other bastard dragons and shoot fire every where. The sons of Scourge of Valkas became to be known as the Preyseizer Dragon types.
This was a stressful time for the Dragon Broodmother, she worked full-time and had to always feed the kids day in and day out. She had no time to just relax and enjoy herself, the youthful errors of her ways had taught her much. She was sitting in this Overgrown Tomb one day when a strange thing happened. A planeswalker happened to be walking by! She had a strange feeling about this planeswalker, for some reason she felt like he could understand her. She asked the strange man what his name was, he replied Sarkhan Vol.
She was a bit hesitant at first and threatened that she would Terminate anything that came near (it was also that time of the month for her), but Sarkhan Vol laughed for he did not fear death from her. She saw his lack of fear and threatened that she would Dreadbore him into the deepest hole she could find and burry him. This quickly made Sarkhan Vol stop laughing.
To ease her mind Sarkhan Vol asked the Dragon Broodmother what was on her mind? She being very stressed finally broke down and told him all the terrible things the other male dragons have done to her. To her surprise he said the solution was simple, forget male dragons and date only other female dragons! This was a radical new idea to her, but it seemed logical. Male dragons did not work, try female dragons.
So after some time she started to search every where under the Green Sun's Zenith for a female dragon that could understand her. If she did not find one, she would try again another day. Sadly, she could not find any female dragon around for days on end. Her hope was dying and she had no Defense of the Heart left in her. While sitting there all depressed full of sorrow, three sneaky goblins approached her and thought it would be wise to throw stones at the Dragon Broodmother (these were extremely stupid goblins). The Dragon Broodmother was depressed she did not even have the strength to fight back.
Then out of no where came this powerful dragon named Utvara Hellkite and with her friend Mycoloth, they happen to be just strolling by. They saw the goblins picking on the Dragon Broodmother and this enraged Utvara Hellkite so much then she squashed the goblins like the little bugs they are. Then Utvara Hellkite asked the Dragon Broodmother why she was so depressed. So naturally while Mycoloth would go and make saprolings all day long, the two dragons began to chat.
Some time would pass and the Dragon Broodmother started to notice how she liked eating ice cream and drinking liquor at Utvara Hellkite cave every night. Utvara Hellkite made the Dragon Broodmother feel appreciated and loved. Utvara Hellkite even knew how it feels to spawn babies for she could spawn her own babies, but only at a really slow pace. Eventually they became lesbian lovers who loved making babies together, it was so bad that the production rate was exponential. To make matters worse, the doctor one day told the Dragon Broodmother she would also be having twins, it was a Doubling Season it would seem.
Both of the dragons started to worry about a food supply, but then they remembered Mycoloth!! He is the happy fungus that likes to make saporlings all day long..All was well.
or a Stomping Ground