KrazyCaley's Top 10 Walls

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KrazyCaley

25 June 2009

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Your opponent looks up at you, his fingers reaching down to twist some cardboard sideways and forward into the red zone. A gleam in his eye, he asks you: "Beats?"

It's a familiar situation, and it's definitely not a comfortable one. No matter what color, no matter what deck archetype you like to play, sometimes what a planeswalker needs is a little peace of mind. Sometimes what you need is a few feet of good solid WALL between you and your opponent's foul beasts. Here are the 10 walls, that, in my opinion, justify you the most in obnoxiously pounding the table and starting the "DE-FENSE.....DE-FENSE" chant.

Criterial note- To make my list, you had to be a wall, not just have defender! No Benevolent Ancestor or Carven Caryatid! We start with a golden oldie.

10 - Wall of Air

For years, this and Wall of Water was what blue mages had to work with. And Wall of Water was antithematic, being a mere blue Wall of Fire. Back in the old days, before shadow and other evasion, a flying wall with 5 toughness could stop all but the meanest of assaults in the early to mid game. And while there are now better walls for three, the Wall of Air still stands strong today, being a much-used classic that still sees some play today, having been reprinted in every core set ever (except for 9th). Wall of Air remains the best all-purpose mono-blue wall there is, 15 years later.

9 - Wall of Bone

Speaking of golden oldies, how about that there Wall o’ Bone? How many times did this play happen among the crazy early Timmies of old?- “I attack with Craw Wurm.” “Ok, I block with Wall of Bone.” “It dies.” “Yeah, but I regenerate it.” “But .I have a Craw Wurm.” Wall of Bone regenerates with the same one black mana as Drudge Skeletons, deters 1 toughness creatures, and can soak a respectable 4 damage from tramplers. Your opponent has to outnumber it, plow through it every time, or use a non-regenerative killer/RFGer on it. And at a mere 3 CMC, that’s a pretty solid wall. But not the best.

8 - Wall of Junk

Now THAT’S what I’m talking about. Of course, you still have to keep it alive through the end of combat or its ability won’t trigger, but an 0/7 for 2? Madness! Do you even NEED that much toughness? The mighty mighty Junk Wall will soak anything your opponent can throw at you in the early game, and that’s before you consider the many, many opportunities for combos. Glaze Fiend alone! Of course, this Wall, being from Urza’s Saga, is legal only in its own block, plus legacy and vintage, but that doesn’t make it any less formidable on the kitchen table.

• 7 - Wall of Blood

Now this is what a black wall should look like! This wall can knock down anything that comes at it, but at the cost of life. Thus, the Wall of Blood functions more as a deterrent rather than a wall you’ll actually use as a blocker with any frequency. But let’s be honest- Wall of Blood isn’t on this list because it can knock down attackers. It’s here because it’s at the heart of many a nefarious black combo. Magus of the Mirror, anyone?

• 6 - Crenellated Wall

That’s right, I said it. Crenellated Wall. From Mercadian Masques. By itself, this Wall is essentially an 0/8 for 4, which is ok, albeit not stunning. Wall of Stone, after all, only costs 3. But what’s impressive about this wall is its toughness booster, which, when you have multiple other blockers, is far more impressive than you might expect. You can laugh Giant Growths to scorn over and over again, save creatures from all sorts of post-combat burn, and generally conduct a super-efficient defense. Yeah, it’s an artifact, and yeah, it’s only 0/4 before it taps to do anything, but when it comes to combat trickiness, this wall is extremely helpful.

• 5 - Shield Sphere

I’ll confess that I may have an irrational preference for this wall. I like, in purely flavor terms, the idea of a metal sphere that flies around and annoyingly gets in enemy creatures’ way, blocking them off wherever they go. But even without the flavor, Shield Sphere is fantastic. 0/6 is a good starting point for this decayer, ensuring that you can get a good three or four solid blocks off of it before it must retire. But wait? How much does it cost? Nothing. Nothing at all. While this doesn’t exactly make Shield Sphere the Black Lotus of walls, it makes it an extremely valuable defensive option on the kitchen table, especially if your buds like weenie aggro.

• 4 - Wall of Reverence

Now we’re getting into some true modern goodness, and into walls that really are respectable in modern metagames. For four you get a 1/6 flyer that gains you at least one life a turn. That by itself is nothing to scoff at, and indeed, many a BW tokens deck nowadays does precisely that in the early game. But then, once the bigger creatures get out, the Wall of Reverence gets pretty ridiculous. A Wall that protects you AND gives you life by itself for four is definitely what I’m looking for in defensive options. And with two of them out? That lets your opponent know that they ought to settle in, maybe bring a drink and some dip to the table, because you’re not going anywhere. Solid.

• 3 - Wall of Glare

Here’s a combo for you. Turn 2, Wall of Glare. Turn 3, put Inviolability on it. Then, proceed to stop worrying about your opponent’s non-evasive creatures ever again (or drop an AEther Web on it too and stop worrying about your opponent’s creatures ever again, evasive or no). ‘Nuff said.

• 2 - Wall of Shadows

So what does it take to kill the Wall of Shadows? Well, ordinary kill spells hit it, of course. Fine. Let your opponent throw down a Terminate, then watch his face as it sinks in that he just used a kill spell on a WALL. Infest/Volcanic Fallout/Wrath of God-style effects aside, an opponent has to go far out of the way to get rid of the Wall of Shadows (which doesn’t die to deathtouch, since combat damage to it is reduced to zero). And if they don’t get rid of it? Pick the biggest, baddest dude on your opponent’s board. That guy’s not a problem for you anymore.

• 1 - Wall of Denial

The only multicolored wall on the list is heads and shoulders above the rest. Good luck with this in the current standard metagame. Kiss all your targeted kill spells goodbye. Fallout doesn’t come CLOSE to killing it. Neither does Infest. So how can you get rid of the Wall of Denial (which costs an insane CMC of three)? Well, you can Wrath ..and that’s about it, as far as practical options go. Deathtouchers do kill it, and there is always the possibility of just flat out overpowering it, but if you’re facing down something that Wall of Denial can’t block, then congratulations, you’ve already survived long enough for your deck to do whatever it’s supposed to do. And while Esperites everywhere mourn the fact that Wall of Denial is not an artifact creature, it will still give them all the time they could possibly expect to gain from a Wall, even against severe threats. Rafiq of the Many? Denied. Bloodbraid Elf? Denied. Anything Sojourner? Denied. Jund Hackblade? Denied. Woolly Thoctar? Denied. Mycoid Shepherd? Denied. Karrthus, Tyrant of Jund? DENIED. FRIGGIN' Blitz Hellion? DEEEEE-NIED!