Results from Underwhelming!

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KrazyCaley

13 January 2010

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My head is spinning. Instead of scoring, I just did tons and tons of playtesting these decks against each other. Trying to playtest these is one of the most difficult Magical tasks I've ever done, and it resulted, among other things in:

a- Someone (not me) getting REALLY drunk,

b- Physical injury while testing Blueclay's deck

c- Someone throwing their hand onto the table and going "GODDAMNIT" while playtesting the "Gotcha Master" deck.

d- The destruction of over 100 (proxied) Blacker Lotuses

e- An epic Chaos Confetti that destroyed an entire board full of 18 permanents.

And other such fun. Nevertheless, 10 decks have emerged as the continuous winners. While the results would have been MUCH different if I had been grading on creativity, as I usually do, this challenge was all about straight up winning. And these decks straight-up win. Top-10 finishers get the "Johnny, C-c-c-combo Breaker" award. Winner gets the "BlackMoxWalkTwisterVaultRecallLotusDrain" award.

10- Namemattersnot - Un-Nexus

Featuring 4x Maelstrom Nexus as the breaker card.

I didn't really expect this deck to do well in playtesting, to be perfectly honest. But it was really quite reliable, as I discovered. It was pretty easy for this deck to get out Maelstrom Nexus, and even when it didn't, pretty giant beats would smack its opponents in the face in very short order. It didn't win as fast as some of the higher-up decks, and it occasionally had trouble dealing with the "immobilizer" decks, but it did very respectably. Namemattersnot gets his second top 10 appearance.

9- Blueclay - Under

Featuring 4x Demonic Consultation as the breaker card.

All I can really say about this deck is that its efficacy depends on your strength, speed, and skill in martial arts. Demonic Consultation finds Vile Bile. You take 2 damage. You put it on the board, then pick it up again, take another 2 damage. Then an epic physical struggle with your opponent ensues wherein you try to poke them with Vile Bile. Certainly this was the most tiring of the decks to play with, and Blueclay gets his second top-10 with this vile number.

8- Illiad - UN-derhanded

Featuring 4x Demonic Tutor as the breaker card.

This deck has a lot going on. I appreciated the fear that it inspired in my opponents while playtesting. Paranoia crept in as Handcuffs, Farewell to Arms and Eye to Eye crept in. Would I sneak in a Cheatyface during the Eye to Eye? Would I play Face to Face and wreck everything given my prior plays? Would Demonic Tutor do 3 damage EVERY time you played it thanks to the Infernal Spawns? Spoiler alert- yes. This marks Illiad's second top-10 appearance as well.

7- Squire - blow the load early

Featuring 4x Black Lotus as the breaker card.

Master Deckbuilder Squire's deck wants to get to Mox Lotus. And, he asks, what better way to get to one Lotus but with other lotuses? While this is a question that will be answered definitively by our top 3 decks, just lotusing the crap out of things with 4x Black Lotus and 4x Blacker Lotus isn't a bad idea either. Squire keeps his name on the list of builders that have appeared in the top 10 of every challenge with this, his third appearance.

6- TAMA - You're a Lucky man

Featuring 4x Chance Encounter as the breaker card.

This deck basically always wins a turn or two after it casts Chance Encounter, thanks to tons and tons of coin-flipping effects, plus Goblin Bookie. And of course, Chance Encounter can come out on turn 1 thanks to Blacker Lotus. Seriously, where will you guys find the cash for all these Blacker Lotuses? I ripped up SO MUCH poor, innocent paper. Tama keeps ahead of the pack with his fourth top-10 appearance.

5- $ªmHεiπ - Unfair

Featuring 4x Black Lotus as the breaker card.

As with Illiad's entry above, $ªmHεiπ's deck has a large number of different ways to kill/annoy (though no ways to Kill! Destroy!) Along with a host of ways to abuse Mox Lotus, samhein can add more than just the 4x Black Lotus as his non-un cards thanks to the ever-popular Richard Garfield, Ph.D.. In a play of questionable legality, I got to use Jace, the Mind Sculptor thanks to the good doctor, who transmuted Johnny, Combo Player into the Worldwake planeswalker. Solid all-around deck, and one that nets $ªmHεiπ his third top-10.

4- TAMA - Unburn

Featuring 4x Stuffy Doll as the breaker card.

It's TAMA again, and this time he brought his pet Stuffy Doll. Guess what? Punctuate now reads "Deal 7 to target player." Pygmy Giant now reads "You win the game." Tama's was the best deck that did not rely on the most evil combo ever invented, as our top 3 did. However, though Tama's nasty use of Stuffy Doll does net him an astonishing fifth top-10 appearance over a mere 3 competitions, his deck can't win if someone else is choosing the targets of spells and abilities...

3- Jimmer - Gleemax Thinks You Are Unchallenging!

Featuring 4x Tinker as the breaker card.

Step one- Blacker Lotus, Ashnod's Coupon. Step two- Tinker the coupon into a Mox Lotus. Step three- Gleemax. All on turn one. Good. Luck. With. That. B.F.M. (Big Furry Monster) can finish your opponents off, and a few counters, other mana sources, and creatures are included to round the deck out. Jimmer's deck won consistently with authority, and it snags him his very first top-10 appearance, and a solid one at the number 3 spot.

2- Illiad - Mana Screwed

Featuring 4x Tinker as the breaker card.

Same idea, different execution. Instead of Gleemax, which takes FOREVER to win compared to his deck, Illiad relies on Greater Morphling and Blast from the Past to pull out quick (but not quick enough, as it turned out) victories after his Tinker to Mox Lotus. I mean, if this deck wins the toss, it's almost certainly going to win. It has tons of backup plans even if it doesn't draw what it wants. Spatula of the Ages, Aesthetic Consultation, and so forth. This makes for Illiad's third top-10 appearance.

1- mwkelley - Obmoxious

Featuring 4x Tinker as the breaker card.

Again the same idea, but with an execution so superior that this deck was able to regularly beat even the #2 and #3 decks with some regularity. Only mwkelley foresaw the power of the Tinker - Mox Lotus combo with Johnny, Combo Player. This deck can literally play EVERY SINGLE CARD IN ITS DECK (and a ton of cards that AREN'T in its deck) ON TURN ONE. Not just get out a Gleemax or play a Blast from the Past from its hand. It can FIND a Gleemax, play it, find and play an infinitely-kicked and bought-back blast, bring out Richard Garfield, Ph.D., then Time Walk a couple of times thanks to _____ , and what the hell, while we're at it, let's tutor up and infini-kick/buy-back another Blast. And do any number of other abusive plays. On turn 1. Good. Lord. mwkelley gets his second top-10 appearance, but it's a doozy, as he is our Unchampion, and our newest Master Deckbuilder.

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I'm going to be taking a short break from the challenges, but fear not. Darkness1835 has volunteered to be my substitute Nullwalker in the meantime. His challenge will be up in a few hours, and after its conclusion, I should be back with you inside of a week.