The Flavor of Zendikar

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Deco_y

1 March 2011

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Good morning, good evening, and possibly good night fellow TappedOut users! To follow up to what may be my best article yet, my previous flavor article, i'm back one more time to explore the goodness that is Magic's flavor. This time, instead of going off Magic 2011, i'm pouring into an entire expansion block: Zendikar. So kick back, pour yourself a glass of your favorite beverage, and read onwards!

Honorable Mention-

Flavor text: "The least of gods shall tower over the mightiest of mortals, and death shall reign over all."
Crypt of Agadeem inscription

A chilling reminder from the folks at MTG that no matter how good you think you are, there will always be something bigger and badder out there, and how fitting that green(who loves to make things bigger and better) would have the creature to remind us of this. What makes it tick is that the Eldrazi gods are giving their spawn the powers to do evil, and we hate them for it.

Flavor text: "This world will not be tamed."

Green loooooooooves growth right? What else does green love? Ramp. What brings them both together? Groundswell. Providing a boost of power off of perhaps Zendikar's signature mechanic, Landfall, it matches what green colored Zendikar is all about: Massive and dangerous mana deposits and the ferocity in which the creatures and spells display when they use it. The flavor speaks of Zendi never being tamed, and going off the looks of this, Wizards just might be right.

Flavor text: No thought but hunger. No strategy but destruction.

Of all the eldrazi fatties flavor, Pathrazor's text gives the clearest message of what the Eldrazi are all about. They kill, and they kill because they both want and have to. Short and to the point, just like the game after you drop this bad boy down.

Flavor text: Goblin lessons include the 2,071 tips for survival. Frek only remembered 2,070.

Classic red flavor on a classic chassis. "Let's let them deal damage to a player or creature based on the amount of lands they have... and then throw in some awesome goblin flavor!" Done, good sir.

10: Arrogant Bloodlord-

Flavor text: "I would rather take my own head than be thwarted by a presumptuous wretch with a shield and a dream."

This arrogant little bastard is for all those black Zendi vampire players who think they're the s$@#. In other words... me. It's fitting that he gets an upgraded P/T with his major drawback, making all those weenie players L O V E chumping him. Sadly this cocky S.O.B. never saw play because, well, Vampire Nighthawk: the reason why no other black 3 drop will get played in standard until Zendi block rotates.

9: Rage Nimbus-

Flavor text: The settlement knew there was something strange about the cloud when the old priest Mandli suddenly grabbed an axe and ran screaming into the hills.

Do you really blame Mandli? I'm pretty sure if I was on Zenikar and I saw a rage-numbus flying towards my village, i'd be running too. This is a nasty wall that can get offensive in a hurry, a perfect red, Zendikar flavored twist on walls.

8: Kor Firewalker-

Flavor text: "A river of lava is just another river to cross."

This pesky Kor was, and still is, the bane of red mages everywhere. White likes to think they can deal justice out to whoever they want, so when you put that smugness onto a card that so easily hoses red, you have a perfect sideboard card for white planeswalkers. The reason it is so cool is that it says it so matter-of-factly, like an open challenge to red players to "remove me, or bend over and take it."

7: Butcher of Malakir-

Flavor text: His verdict is always guilty. His sentence is always death.

Evil? Check. Brutal? check. Unforgiving? Check. I could go on and on about how this flavor just rocks the blackness of it all. This expensive bloodsucker makes your opponent thinks twice about using removal on your creatures and can put a serious dent in their plans. In the untamed and viscious world of Zenikar, black couldn't ask for a better poster boy.

6: Day of Judgment-

Flavor text: "I have seen planes leveled and all life rendered to dust. It brought no pleasure, even to a heart as dark as mine." Sorin Markov

Sorin's lament is shared by many a planeswalker who day of judgment has been springed upon. Nothing causes a weenie player so much pain as this card. Sorin wants you to know that in real life, getting everything wiped out will make you a sad panda. As I always say, theres no use for power if there is nothing left to enforce with it.

5: Scute Mob-

Flavor text:"Survival rule 781: There are always more scute bugs." Zurdi, goblin shortcutter

Ohhhhh Scute Mob. How you exemplify green's ability to grow, grow, grow. Seriously, can you do nothing else but annoy everyone you get played against? You also notice the reference to one of our honorable mentions, Spire Barrage. That being said, Scute Mob is a bad ass card that can take advantage of players who use and abuse Zendi's Landfall mechanic and can let you quickly bulk up mid-game for a finishing blow, considering the abnormal amount of ways to get that damage through available to green.

4: Near-Death Experience-

Flavor text: Lands ravaged, cities in ruins, so many lives sacrificed, and yet there was no other word for it but victory.

This is probably some of my favorite serious flavor text, and goes perfectly with the story of the Eldrazi and fit's white's fixation on life totals. It shows that the term "victory" can be anything from whalloping your opponent without taking a scratch, or getting the s#!% kicked out of you and barely scraping by. In a real world context this is some deep stuff, but for magic, it's just another one of the epic flavor texts.

3: Forked Bolt-

Flavor text: "Play no favorites. Everybody dies." Sparkmage saying

Well, reguardless of what plane your on, Red just wants to burn and kill anything it can shake a stick at. What sets forked bolt apart from other red flavor is A.) It's incredibly badass quote and B.) It matches the card's abilities perfect. By splitting up your bolt, more things(under the right circumstance mind you) die. Play no favorites, mages.

2: Abyssal Persecutor-

Flavor text: His slaves crave death more then they desire freedom. He denies them both.

This card sends shivers down my spine. The first time I ever gazed upon it's cruel and demanding art, I knew that this would be one epic card. Not only does he do an amazing job at being a demon, punishing you for summoning it and sure as hell beating your opponent, but his flavor is near flawless. His "slaves" are you and your opponent. Your opponent craves death from getting bashed in the face repeatedly. You desire the freedom to get him off your board. But he sticks around and punishes you both, in terms of flavor, I will go as far as to say this is the perfect demon. Drink it up. Plus, i'm pretty sure he's holding a Doom Blade. <3

1: Time of Heroes-

Flavor text: No one spoke. There was no need. The threat of the Eldrazi presented a simple choice: lay down your weapons and die for nothing, or hold them fast and die for something.

Epic. That is what this card's flavor is. Not only does it seriously pump up one of the Zenikar block's signature mechanics, levelers, it also makes you pause and read and appreciate the art. It may not be the best flavor on it's own, as that is Persecutor, but in the context of the block and the story of the Eldrazi, this card paints the grim picture that Zendikar's inhabitants faced when they realized what was going on. An excellent piece of brilliance from Wizards, in every way.

That's my list for the ten best flavors of Zendikar. If you have a favorite set that you would like to be featured on here, leave a comment below or send me an e-mail at the adress found on my page. Until next time, my fellow planswalkers, may Blinding Mage light your path to success.