Maybeboard

Creature (105)

Instant (20)

Planeswalker (4)

Enchantment (98)

Artifact (43)

Sorcery (84)

Land (44)


*~ The Chompy Masterpiece Collection - Vol. V: Magus Roseus ~*

The Salvation Army

Five colors. One highly itinerant general. As many of the craziest cards in Magicdom as possible. Zero win condition.

The Salvation Army: Coming to a Nintendo 3DS because they got killed super-early near you.

This is a deck that I built a few years ago because I was getting a little bored of playing EDH with the same basic strategy every time (i.e. to defeat my opponents and win). So instead, I built a deck with an entirely different set of aspirations: to create instead of to destroy, to give instead of to take! Karona, False God was the perfect choice for this purpose, letting us run any cards we like while fitting with our major theme of "spread the wealth".

With access to all 5 colors, this deck technically falls within the realm of the Gold Mage. However, the primary purpose of this deck is to manipulate the game in amusing ways, not with the goal of undoing your would-be opponents, but with the intent to actually boost them in fun / unforeseen / abusive ways that hopefully make you a beloved ally / useful lackey. In short, it is a so-called "Group Hug" deck, and it is therefore within the jurisdiction of the elusive Pink (or "Rosy") Mage. Who "wins the game" is not of real concern to this pacifist mage - unless of course some insolent infidel makes it their concern. In the end, the goal is to be left in a 1-on-1 situation, whereupon you accept the humble submission of the last general left standing - the Pink Mage's new Champion. The Salvation Army never loses.

Remember that: The Salvation Army never loses.

Still, Man is less tempted when you remove his options; this is why Propaganda effects are so critical to us. Cards such as Collective Restraint and Sphere of Safety give our opponents that little extra excuse not to attack us without otherwise upsetting their plans (or their ability to attack others).

I also might consider adding in cards like Darksteel Plate or (more amusingly) Bear Umbra for Karona - cards that give her indestructible / increased protection. This is because players are often very greedy with the False God, using her attack bonus to their advantage but trying to get her killed in the same swing, so that others may not enjoy the Truth of her (False) Word. It is truly a disgusting thing to do to a Living God, and though I often warn these blasphemers that they shall surely pay for so dire a sin in the Times To Come, yet still do most follow through with the wicked deed. A Shield of Kaldra would make such flagrant god-abuse much more difficult.

Truthfully, the biggest challenge when playing this deck is simply knowing when to do what. The first few times you play, it can be difficult to predict what sort of effect your spells will have on the game - but here are a few tips:

Turn order matters a lot when this deck is in the game. Whoever goes immediately after you is going to get the biggest benefit from your general and your Pink Mage spells since they will be able to capitalize on them first. This is especially true when you cast a Thieves' Auction. However, this benefit becomes a small disadvantage during Will of the Council effects (such as that on Coercive Portal) and Joint Effort effects (such as that on Collective Voyage), since it is preferable to vote / pay mana last after you've witnessed everyone else's decisions.

Draw spells like Minds Aglow, Prosperity and Windfall will give a much bigger advantage to players with more mana, since they will be able to play more of the cards they draw. Mid- to late-game, this usually means Green Mages receive the greatest benefit from big draws.

Mana ramp spells like Collective Voyage and New Frontiers are the biggest help to players who are losing in the mana race, either due to missed land drops of lack of mana acceleration. Zhur-Taa Ancient, on the other hand, favors players with more lands to tap.

You may not want to play Karona if you're playing in a game with tribal generals like Sliver Overlord or Krenko, Mob Boss - unless you want them to win, of course.

Speaking of tribes, Karona has the creature type "Avatar" according to an errata on Gatherer, in case you want her triggered ability to give her +3/+3. That makes her an 8/8 - a three-swing killer. And she has Haste. And she can attack on everybody's turn. So be careful - in a four-player game, if the player who goes immediately before you has no blockers when you play your general, that player may not see another turn. Likewise, if you have no other blockers when you play her in a four-player game...

By the way, Karona, False God = Akroma, Angel of Wrath + Phage the Untouchable. Did you know that? You see, when two female demigods love/hate each other very much...

There are other changes to consider, primarily new group-huggy / crazy cards that have been printed since the last time I added to this deck a few years back. I would appreciate all suggestions of crazy / funny / rarely used / group-huggy cards, no matter the color!

One last note... The Door to Nothingness is a rare weapon, only to be used against incarnations of the True Evil. You will know them when you see them.

Old Maybes: Aurification, Bear Umbra, Concordant Crossroads, Darksteel Plate, Edric, Spymaster of Trest, Elephant Grass, Ghostly Prison, Grenzo's Rebuttal, Indestructibility, Katabatic Winds, Koskun Falls, Magister of Worth, Maze of Ith, Norn's Annex, Propaganda, Reverence, Shield of Kaldra, Teferi's Moat, Vow of Wildness, Web of Inertia, Windborn Muse, Word of Command (An "F" or Foil mark indicates that a card is slated "For Removal" if it's in the Mainboard, or "For Insertion" if in the Maybeboard.)

Vol. I: Intet Dreams of Yesterday’s Day After Tomorrow (2008)Vol. II: The Great Chain (2009)Vol. III: Sliver Overlord Is Watching You (2010)Vol. IV: The One Where Radiant Gets Mad (2010)Vol. V: The Salvation Army (2011)Vol. VI: Zero-Point Omnath (2012)Vol. VII: Wu Daze, Blue Knights (2013)Vol. VIII: Mach Daddy Karn (2014)Vol. IX: Τὰ Πυρὰ τοῦ ὈλύμπουThe Fires of Olympus (2014)

Suggestions

Comments

Date added 10 years
Last updated 3 years
Legality

This deck is Commander / EDH legal.

Rarity (main - side)

3 - 0 Mythic Rares

49 - 0 Rares

30 - 0 Uncommons

8 - 0 Commons

Cards 100
Avg. CMC 4.15
Tokens Spirit 1/1 C, Zombie 2/2 B
Folders EDH
Votes
Ignored suggestions
Shared with
Views