This Kid is a Prick (Standard MTG Deck)

There isn't a whole lot to say. This deck doesn't like my opponent getting their way, like a selfish kid. So, it kinda takes on a "screw this" attitude...I don't know where it gets it from. My other decks don't behave like this...I don't know where I went wrong as a deck parent shakes head. This guy does all kinds of dick-ish things.

He'll interrupt you, making you Dissolve plans and friendships alike...your entire life will basically Dissipate. He likes to pull pranks like some sort of Polymorphist's Jest leaving you feeling like you just got Turn to Frog.

He doesn't think much of you or your friends, considering them a Curse of the Swine, reducing them to little more than pigs in his eyes. What makes matters worse is that he's crafty as a pair of Rogue's Gloves. He's smart, like Military Intelligence style, meaning he never seems to run out of tricks.

What's worse is that he has seriously starting hanging out with the wrong kind of kids. These guys feed his pranks with some serious prowess. Jeskai Elder and her sibling Jeskai Windscout are all kinds of bad news. They are little guys, but they can be fast and do more than just bite at your ankles and Riverwheel Aerialists are nothing more than bullies. But the worse of his friends is Chasm Skulker (his mother must be so proud). This little sh*t feeds off this guys ideas, bulking up like he is on steroids. I heard someone really screwed him over one time, so Chasm Skulker bombarded em with squid. Their little gang is starting to take over territory. As they gain more land, these hooligans are going to be a regular Scourge of Fleets, bringing everything down around them like some mythical Kraken of the Straits.

They like to Ensoul Artifacts like little dark wizards...They think they can build this indestructible Darksteel Citadel... but really, what they did to this poor little Ornithopter once...it just wasn't right.

I feel horrible. This deck is a patient little prick who doesn't mind poking you with a stick. I wish I just knew where I went wrong. as a parent, you want what's best, but all I can do is look at the people I play with and apologize. Decks these days have no respect. Maybe you could help me find a way to make a model citizen out of these hooligans!

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The Big Kids — Oct. 30, 2014

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Well, this little prick is at it again. After realizing that he was a still a small fish in a big pond, he should have realized it was time to start behaving...Of course instead, my little darling went out and made friends with some big fish who can protect him.
He ditched his friend Whirlwind Adept for some more muscle...His loyalty to his friends...sheesh. He replaced them with Scourge of Fleets and Kraken of the Straits, some serious big boys who feed off the fact this is mono-blue. This A-hole is no longer content just to Cancel your plans, he picked up a few new friends. They call themselves the Dragon's Eye Savants gang. The kids don't have much muscle, but still offer a lot of local protection for cheap. These kids are getting serious...

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Revision 1 See all

(9 years ago)

+2	Aqueous Form	main
+2	Arbiter of the Ideal	main
+2	Bident of Thassa	main
-1	Curse of the Swine	main
-3	Dissipate	main
-1	Ensoul Artifact	main
+2	Fascination	main
+1	Interpret the Signs	main
+3	Negate	main
+1	Ordeal of Thassa	main
-1	Ornithopter	main
-1	Polymorphist's Jest	main
+2	Prognostic Sphinx	main
-1	Rogue's Gloves	main
+2	Stratus Walk	main
+1	Thassa, God of the Sea	main
+2	Wall of Frost	main
-1	Darksteel Citadel	main
-2	dragon's eye Savant	main
-1	Kraken of the Straits	main

Top Ranked	Achieved #90 position overall 10 years ago
Date added	10 years
Last updated	9 years
Legality	This deck is not Standard legal.
Rarity (main - side)	1 - 0 Mythic Rares 12 - 0 Rares 12 - 0 Uncommons 13 - 0 Commons
Cards	61
Avg. CMC	3.11
Tokens	Squid 1/1 U
Folders	standard, Standard, Standard, Decks I wanna build
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