I had several requests on the discord for a how-to-play guide, so here it is!
Pregame: Mulligan twice (i.e. mull to 6), then mulligan until you have a mountain, island, and forest in hand.
Gameplay note 1: Play with all your cards facing the opponent whose turn it is. Yes, this means turning the cards as play passes around the table. If asked what you are doing, explain that you are making it easier for [opponent’s name] to read your card. Bonus points if you are using full art lands and have not cast anything yet. (It may also be easier to just turn your entire playmat sideways, if you use a playmat.
Gameplay note two: when tapping your lands, rotate them so they go the long way around (270 degrees). Bonus points if you are playing against Riley Knight while doing this.
Gameplay note three: Periodically check one of the “How to Play Magic” foldable guides. If you do not have one, they come with planeswalker decks.
Gameplay note four: Periodically check one of the “How to play Commander” foldable guides. If you do not have one, they come with the new set commander precons (and maybe the other commander precons?)
Turn 1: Untap. Upkeep. Draw. Pass to combat phase. Declare no attacks. Pass to second main. Play Island. Pass turn.
Between turns 1 and 2: Hold up [U], threateningly. Every time priority is passed to you, take a few seconds before declaring no effects.
Turn 2: Untap. Upkeep. Draw. Pass to combat phase. Declare no attacks. Pass to second main. Play Forest. Pass turn.
Between turns 2 and 3: Hold up [U][G], threateningly. Every time priority is passed to you, take a few seconds before declaring no effects.
Turn 3: Untap. Upkeep. Draw. Pass to combat phase. Declare no attacks. Pass to second main. Play Mountain. Cast Haldan. Pass turn.
Between turns 3 and 4: Observe the opponents, pass priority without hesitation.
Turn 4: Untap. Upkeep. Draw. Pass to combat phase. Consider attacking with Haldan, but decide to declare no attacks. Pass to second main. Play land. Pass turn.
Between turns 4 and 5: Hold up [R][U][G][1], threateningly. Every time priority is passed to you, take a few seconds before declaring no effects.
Turn 5: Untap. Upkeep. Draw. Play a land. Pass to combat phase. Consider attacking with Haldan and Pako, but decide to only attack with Pako. Make sure Pako connects, negotiate if necessary. Pass to second main. Pass turn.
Between turns 5 and 6: Observe the opponents, pass priority without hesitation.
Turn 6 and beyond: Follow your gut! If you need more guidance, comment with your question!
Postgame: Display your full deck to your opponents. Watch them weep.