Eat Your Kids

Commander / EDH* BRGW Group Slug Jank Theme/Gimmick Tokens Voltron

djewell

Creature (28)

• 1x Bastion Protector
• 1x Birds of Paradise
• 1x Blood Artist
• 1x Champion of Lambholt
• 1x Corpse Knight
• 1x Cruel Celebrant
• 1x Elenda, the Dusk Rose
• 1x Goblin Sharpshooter
• 1x Heliod's Pilgrim
• 1x Ivy Lane Denizen
• 1x Krav, the Unredeemed
• 1x Maw of the Obzedat
• 1x Mayhem Devil
• 1x Mazirek, Kraul Death Priest
• 1x Mycoloth
• 1x Orochi Leafcaller
• 1x Poison-Tip Archer
• 1x Priest of Forgotten Gods
• 1x Purphoros, God of the Forge
• 1x Requiem Angel
• 1x Skyshroud Elf
• 1x Slimefoot, the Stowaway
• 1x Sylvan Caryatid
• 1x Syr Konrad, the Grim
• 1x Teysa Karlov
• 1x Utopia Mycon
• 1x Viscera Seer
• 1x Zulaport Cutthroat

Instant (7)

• 1x Assassin's Trophy
• 1x Enlightened Tutor
• 1x Path to Exile
• 1x Swords to Plowshares
• 1x Tragic Slip
• 1x Utter End
• 1x Wear / Tear

Planeswalker (1)

• 1x Huatli, Radiant Champion

Land (36)

• 1x Ash Barrens
• 1x Blood Crypt
• 1x Caves of Koilos
• 1x Command Tower
• 1x Darigaaz's Caldera
• 1x Dragonskull Summit
• 1x Evolving Wilds
• 1x Exotic Orchard
• 5x Forest
• 1x Godless Shrine
• 1x Karplusan Forest
• 3x Mountain
• 1x Orzhov Basilica
• 1x Overgrown Tomb
• 5x Plains
• 1x Reliquary Tower
• 1x Rogue's Passage
• 1x Rootbound Crag
• 1x Sacred Foundry
• 1x Stomping Ground
• 1x Sunpetal Grove
• 4x Swamp
• 1x Temple Garden

Artifact (11)

• 1x Altar of the Brood
• 1x Blade of the Bloodchief
• 1x Gruul Signet
• 1x Inquisitor's Flail
• 1x Key to the City
• 1x Mirage Mirror
• 1x Prowler's Helm
• 1x Skullclamp
• 1x Sol Ring
• 1x Swiftfoot Boots
• 1x Trailblazer's Boots

Commanders (2)

Enchantment (11)

• 1x Anointed Procession
• 1x Canopy Cover
• 1x Dictate of Erebos
• 1x Duelist's Heritage
• 1x Evolutionary Leap
• 1x Fallen Ideal
• 1x Fecundity
• 1x Impact Tremors
• 1x Sadistic Glee
• 1x Shadows of the Past
• 1x Soul Tithe

Sorcery (4)

• 1x Bitter Ordeal
• 1x Idyllic Tutor
• 1x Open the Armory
• 1x Revoke Existence

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Maybeboard

Creature (5)

• 1x Faeburrow Elder
• 1x Hell's Caretaker
• 1x Hissing Iguanar
• 1x Martyred Rusalka
• 1x Mentor of the Meek

Enchantment (4)

• 1x Alpha Authority
• 1x Break Through the Line
• 1x Martyr's Cause
• 1x Vow of Malice

Artifact (4)

• 1x Altar of Dementia
• 1x Skeleton Key
• 1x Vorrac Battlehorns
• 1x Whispersilk Cloak

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The Tragedy of Darth Kronos, The Hungry

If You Can't Beat'Em, Eat'Em

Kronos had it right, but his execution was lacking. You want to make sure nobody can take your place? You HAVE to eat your kids. It worked great for him until his wife had Zeus in secret and that came back to bite him

... heh ...

His plan would have worked except for that little detail. Here's where Tana comes in. She figures that since SHE is the one giving birth to the little rug-rats, nobody can stop her from eating her own kids, right?? Plus she's getting preggo just on the sheer blood lust she gets from smacking the crap outta people. No room for any spousal betrayal or disapproval there.

What's that? Who's Ravos, Soultender to Tana? He's uh.. well.. We don't speak of him. He really Just kinda provides color. He has some limited use as a buffer and a utility creature retriever.. but this best reflects the relationship we have with Ravos..

Meet Kronos 2.0 Let's take a look at what she's got going for her.

Fetus Deleteus

Babies are in fact the most nutritious form of battle fuel. Let me show you why. They provide all the necessary stimulants for proper thrashing such as Growth, Explosiveness and Flexibility!

1. Growth

In order for Tana, the Bloodsower to truly secure her reign of dominance she needs to grow as a person, lest her babies rise up against her. As she consumes her babies, she has recruited help to properly harness their energy with her staff of sous-chefs.

On this staff are Huatli, Radiant Champion, Ivy Lane Denizen, Maw of the Obzedat, Mazirek, Kraul Death Priest, Fallen Ideal, Sadistic Glee and Blade of the Bloodchief.

Duelist's Heritage and Inquisitor's Flail (which stacks up with double strike thereby eliminating the possibility of receiving combat damage from creatures) are added to the offspring as a spicy kick.

As an honorable mention, we have our food-prep assistant, Bastion Protector. As a bonus, Teysa Karlov can multiply the effect of a couple of these, although not all of them.

2. Explosiveness

As the offspring come in, we get hyped for the next meal with Corpse Knight, Impact Tremors and Purphoros, God of the Forge.

After our meal, there's no need to let the scraps go to waste! Why don't we put those bones to some good use? Blood Artist, Cruel Celebrant,

Elenda, the Dusk Rose (who is really just the turkey of the feast that we need to fatten up before we roast),

Goblin Sharpshooter (who you should tap between each and every offspring consumed),

Mayhem Devil, Poison-Tip Archer, Slimefoot, the Stowaway, Syr Konrad, the Grim and Zulaport Cutthroat.

Another mention that helps really savor the flavor is Requiem Angel and once again Teysa Karlov gives us an added boost to the majority of that.

3. Flexibility

Who doesn't like some nice utility in a deck? Lets look at some just all around bonus effects that happen or trigger as you go about leaving destruction in your wake.

Shadows of the Past gives you a nice scry ability by default and Viscera Seer gives you the same thing but also an alternative outlet for sacrifice to help trigger Blade of the Bloodchief or Sadistic Glee or those other sacrifice and death triggers you have.

Utopia Mycon while having a pretty sad token generation pace, does provide a nice way to get mana that you need when you need it and trigger both sacrifice and death triggers.

Krav, the Unredeemed lets you gain life and draw cards for each creature you sacrifice, paying only and in true commander form, you can use this guy for some politics in the game while still buffing him up!

Bitter Ordeal Is just amazing... remove all threats from your opponents' decks as a bonus to feeding Tana.

Anointed Procession "We're having twins!"

Dictate of Erebos For complete board control

Fecundity for card draw

Evolutionary Leap To turn your tokens into a search for all the utility creatures.

Altar of the Brood Is just disruption techniques. This is not a mill deck. CAN it be a mill deck? I guess! But this is always an early removed artifact.. it's a threat that forces them to waste removal on, and you might remove some important threats as you make them contemplate if it's worth using a removal spell on.

and finally,

Mirage Mirror Because the possibilities are endless.

Know Your Weakness Or Others Will Exploit it

As with all decks that are reliant on the commander, we are going to be in an interesting bind. Usually on the first game the deck is janky enough and the commander unassuming enough to get you through to late game while they have no idea what is going on and what is about to hit them. Seasoned players against this deck, however, will know that if they can shut Tana down, they can shut you down. There's a couple of ways you can deal with this but they aren't always full-proof.

Swiftfoot Boots and Canopy Cover are your primary means of defense. I know it's not a lot.. but you do have some tutors that can help you get those quicker.

Things like Heliod's Pilgrim, Idyllic Tutor, Open the Armory and Enlightened Tutor can be used to search many things such as Purphoros, God of the Forge if you've got protection and buffing covered or things like Fallen Ideal or Trailblazer's Boots as you see pieces of your combo you need to grab. Protection is not an exception to that.

The second thing that could keep you from going off is the inability to snowball. You need to be able to get in with those small hits and start generating saprolings before you can use them as fuel. Tana's trample is a great resource as she can use the saprolings to get stronger, but it's all for nothing if she can't get the first few hits off.

That's where Trailblazer's Boots, Prowler's Helm, Rogue's Passage, Canopy Cover and Key to the City will help with that. Even Fallen Ideal because of the flying ability can potentially help you break through.

Aside from that, You have a pretty fun deck with lots of chump blockers that takes care of itself and is fun to watch. Don't forget about your triggers!!

Let me know what suggestions you have for the deck or what you think in general! I have had the deck a while and it's an absolute blast to play. Thanks!

Date added	4 years
Last updated	4 years
Legality	This deck is Commander / EDH legal.
Rarity (main - side)	5 - 0 Mythic Rares 36 - 0 Rares 29 - 0 Uncommons 13 - 0 Commons
Cards	100
Avg. CMC	2.67
Tokens	Emblem Huatli, Radiant Champion, Saproling 1/1 G, Spirit 1/1 W, Vampire 1/1 W