Every Masochist Needs a Marchesa to Love Them

Commander / EDH Competitive Midrange Multiplayer Primer Sacrifice UBR (Grixis) Value Engine

Last_Laugh

Creature (29)

• 1x Alesha, Who Laughs at Fate
• 1x Baleful Strix
• 1x Bloodletter of Aclazotz
• 1x Braids, Arisen Nightmare
• 1x Carrion Feeder
• 1x Danny Pink
• 1x Falkenrath Aristocrat
• 1x Flayer of the Hatebound
• 1x Flesh Duplicate
• 1x Gray Merchant of Asphodel
• 1x Grim Haruspex
• 1x High-Society Hunter
• 1x Imperial Recruiter
• 1x Kardur, Doomscourge
• 1x Kokusho, the Evening Star
• 1x Liliana's Standard Bearer
• 1x Metallic Mimic
• 1x Mikaeus, the Unhallowed
• 1x Phantasmal Image
• 1x Phyrexian Metamorph
• 1x Pitiless Plunderer
• 1x Sage of Fables
• 1x Spark Double
• 1x Spellskite
• 1x Terror of the Peaks
• 1x Vigean Graftmage
• 1x Viscera Seer
• 1x Yahenni, Undying Partisan
• 1x Yawgmoth, Thran Physician

Sorcery (8)

• 1x Blasphemous Act
• 1x Blasphemous Edict
• 1x Demonic Tutor
• 1x Diabolic Intent
• 1x Feed the Swarm
• 1x Last One Standing
• 1x Toxic Deluge
• 1x Wave Goodbye

Land (31)

• 1x Ancient Tomb
• 1x Arid Mesa
• 1x Blood Crypt
• 1x Bloodstained Mire
• 1x City of Brass
• 1x Command Tower
• 1x Flooded Strand
• 3x Island
• 1x Mana Confluence
• 1x Marsh Flats
• 1x Misty Rainforest
• 3x Mountain
• 1x Phyrexian Tower
• 1x Polluted Delta
• 1x Scalding Tarn
• 1x Shivan Reef
• 1x Steam Vents
• 1x Sulfurous Springs
• 3x Swamp
• 1x Underground River
• 1x Urborg, Tomb of Yawgmoth
• 1x Verdant Catacombs
• 1x Volrath's Stronghold
• 1x Watery Grave
• 1x Wooded Foothills

Enchantment (9)

• 1x Dictate of Erebos
• 1x Goblin Bombardment
• 1x Grave Pact
• 1x Necropotence
• 1x Rhystic Study
• 1x Sneak Attack
• 1x Thran Vigil
• 1x Uncivil Unrest
• 1x Unspeakable Symbol

Commander (1)

Artifact (14)

• 1x Anduril, Narsil Reforged
• 1x Arcane Signet
• 1x Ashnod's Altar
• 1x Dimir Signet
• 1x Izzet Signet
• 1x Lightning Greaves
• 1x Rakdos Signet
• 1x Skullclamp
• 1x Sol Ring
• 1x Swiftfoot Boots
• 1x Talisman of Creativity
• 1x Talisman of Dominance
• 1x Talisman of Indulgence
• 1x The Ozolith

Instant (8)

• 1x Chaos Warp
• 1x Cyclonic Rift
• 1x Fierce Guardianship
• 1x Lethal Scheme
• 1x Plumb the Forbidden
• 1x Ripples of Potential
• 1x Saw in Half
• 1x Vampiric Tutor

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Maybeboard

Creature (36)

• 1x Baleful Strix
• 1x Burglar Rat
• 1x Canoptek Tomb Sentinel
• 1x Chasm Skulker
• 1x Dack's Duplicate
• 1x Disciple of Bolas
• 1x Dockside Extortionist
• 1x Drana, Liberator of Malakir
• 1x Elderfang Disciple
• 1x Elvish Doomsayer
• 1x Gisa, Glorious Resurrector
• 1x Glen Elendra Archmage
• 1x Grimgrin, Corpse-Born
• 1x Herald of Secret Streams
• 1x Immersturm Predator
• 1x Junji, the Midnight Sky
• 1x Kroxa, Titan of Death's Hunger
• 1x Legion Loyalist
• 1x Liliana's Specter
• 1x Mahadi, Emporium Master
• 1x Midnight Reaper
• 1x Nezumi Informant
• 1x Nicol Bolas, the Ravager  ^Flip
• 1x Noxious Toad
• 1x Ogre Battledriver
• 1x Oona's Blackguard
• 1x Pitiless Plunderer
• 1x Rankle, Master of Pranks
• 1x Sadistic Hypnotist
• 1x Sakashima of a Thousand Faces
• 1x Syr Konrad, the Grim
• 1x Tinybones, Trinket Thief
• 1x Urabrask the Hidden
• 1x Vendilion Clique
• 1x Virus Beetle
• 1x Zealous Conscripts

Enchantment (4)

• 1x Black Market Connections
• 1x Pain Magnification
• 1x Phyrexian Reclamation
• 1x Words of Waste

Sorcery (2)

• 1x Jokulhaups
• 1x Seize the Spotlight

Artifact (3)

• 1x Mana Crypt
• 1x Phyrexian Altar
• 1x Sword of Feast and Famine

Land (1)

• 1x Rix Maadi, Dungeon Palace

Instant (1)

• 1x Deflecting Swat

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2.26 Non-Creature and 3.47 Creature CMC avgs. 2.78 overall (discounting Phyrexian Metamorph, Fierce Guardianship, Lethal Scheme, Blasphemous Edict, and Blasphemous Act) - Updated 11/18/24

Ok, first things first... save your Chaos Warp /Feed the Swarm entirely for problematic enchantments, those things will wreck your day (I'm looking at you Solemnity and Rest in Peace).

The deck is a synergistic nightmare for your opponents. It is set up as both an aggro deck and to abuse ETB/Death triggers and is VERY aggressive with life as a resource. Several lands, creatures, artifacts, and enchantments cause you to lose life (31 cards) and you can always smack yourself with Flayer of the Hatebound, Goblin Bombardment, and Terror of the Peaks (It's the right answer sometimes). Spellskite can also redirect the same spell or ability on the stack as many times as needed to lower your life also.

Metallic Mimic, Sage of Fables, Vigean Graftmage, Unspeakable Symbol, Spark Double, Uncivil Unrest, Thran Vigil, and Mikaeus, the Unhallowed all (except Thran Vigil) allow you to abuse etb/death triggers on everyone's turn instead of once per round.

Note that almost the entirety of my maybeboard is for a discard subtheme I'm considering with Marchesa.

I've never once comboed to win even though there is a lethal infinite combo in the deck. I instead rely on tons of synergy and attacking my opponents resources for more of a war of attrition approach.

INFINITE COMBO

Ashnod's Altar + Flayer of the Hatebound + Sage of Fables for infinite damage and card draw.

1: Sac Flayer to Altar for {2}, Flayer immediately comes back with a +1+1 counter and hits anything for 5.

2: Use the floating {2} with Sage to remove Flayer's +1+1 counter and draw a card.

3: Rinse and repeat until all opponents are certifiably dead!

Plugging Mikaeus, the Unhallowed into this combo allows you to replace Flayer of the Hatebound with any non-human that ISN'T a wizard for infinite ETB's.

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Feedback, upvotes, and ideas are appreciated, thanks in advance.

Feel free to check out my other decks.

ACTIVE:

{U}{B}{R} Every Masochist Needs a Marchesa to Love Them

{W}{B}{R} Spanisshin Inquisisshin

{W}{U}{B} Alela's Aerodynamics: A Crash Course

{W}{U}{R} Bipedal Beastmode (Éowyn Human Tribal)

{W}{U}{G} Dopplegangbangers - Historic Flash Convoke Copies

{W}{R}{G} Taste the Painbow - Rienne Multicolor/Legendaries

RETIRED:

{W} Goldmane... The Other Brother

{U}{B}{G} Muldrotha's Madhouse ⫷Primer⫸

{W}{B}{G} Added Layers of Protection - Tymna & Sidar

{W}{R}{G} Marisi the Pimp - (Combat) Trickin' Hoes

{B}{R}{G} Prossh's Dastardly Bastard Children - Group Slug

{U}{R}{G} Animar, Gaea's Hemorrhoid ⫷PRIMER⫸

{W}{G} Sisay's Hombres -Hatebears

{W}{B}{R} Edgar's Dega Vampires

{G}{B}{U}{W} Little Rey of Ishine (Reyhan/Ishai)

CRAFTED (NEVER PLAYED):

{W}{R} "Wake Up, Wasteland! It's Me, Three Dog!"

{W}{B}{G} The Calm Before The Swarm -Mazirek/Vrestin Insects (Rule 0)

BUILT FOR FRIENDS:

{U}{B}{G} Boot Scootin' Booger - Felix Five Boots

{W}{B}{R} "The Devil's Invoice" - Vihaan Treasuristocrats

{W}{R}{G} Ghired's Parrots: "Stop Copying Me, Squawk"

Top Ranked	Achieved #6 position overall 5 years ago Achieved #4 position in Commander / EDH 5 years ago Achieved #1 position in Commander / EDH Primer 5 years ago
Date added	7 years
Last updated	4 weeks
Legality	This deck is Commander / EDH legal.
Rarity (main - side)	11 - 0 Mythic Rares 56 - 0 Rares 19 - 0 Uncommons 4 - 0 Commons
Cards	100
Avg. CMC	2.78
Tokens	City's Blessing, Copy Clone, Morph 2/2 C, Treasure
Folders	EDH, allies, Interesting, Decklist Comparisons, Fun EDH ideas, Neat Decks, test decks, Watch, cmdr, EDH