Goblin Coffeeshop

Standard Aggro Burn Goblins Mono-Red Tribal

PoisonMushroom

Creature (22)

• 4x Fanatical Firebrand
• 4x Goblin Chainwhirler
• 2x Goblin Warchief
• 4x Legion Warboss
• 4x Skirk Prospector
• 4x Wily Goblin

Instant (13)

• 4x Lightning Strike
• 3x Risk Factor
• 2x Run Amok
• 4x Shock

Land (20)

• 20x Mountain

Enchantment (3)

• 3x Experimental Frenzy

Sorcery (2)

• 2x Lava Coil

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Sideboard

Instant (3)

• 2x Fiery Cannonade
• 1x Risk Factor

Land (1)

• 1x Detection Tower

Enchantment (1)

• 1x Experimental Frenzy

Sorcery (5)

• 3x Banefire
• 2x Lava Coil

Artifact (2)

• 2x Sorcerous Spyglass

Creature (3)

• 3x Goblin Cratermaker

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"Turns out coffee is the weird aunt of invention."

-- Experimental Frenzy flavor text

Overview

"You see a lot of goblins decks that use Experimental Frenzy, but yours is more like a Frenzy deck that uses goblins."

Let's start with the basic premise: Siege-Gang Commander is bad. In a meta thick with board wipes and spot removal (Deafening Clarion, Lava Coil, Ritual of Soot, Assassin's Trophy, and Cast Down, just to name a few), it's a five-mana lord who more often than not just ends up being a glorified Goblin Instigator. What this deck aims to do instead is to use Instants and Skirk Prospector to pretend my goblins are Runaway Steam-Kin. This allows the deck to function as both creature-based aggro and monored burn, pivoting and siding to emphasize one side or the other depending on the needs of the game. The engines are Experimental Frenzy and Risk Factor, which are a nonbo with each other, but each so good on their own that they're worth playing around. All this together, the win condition is aggressive card advantage, turning useless early-game weenies into fuel for Frenzy chains.

Mainboard and Deck Philosophy

Before we get into specific cards, let's talk about the intentions of the mainboard, and the deck in general. Because the current meta includes a good mix of aggro/burn, midrange, and control, the deck needs to be able to adapt to all of the match-ups with at least some degree of competence. The sideboard will help in Game 2, but a jack-of-all-trades mainboard minimizes the chance of a complete shutout in Game 1 on a bad match-up.

A lesson I had to learn the hard way with this deck is to not be stingy with my spells, and to be judicious with taking one-for-one trades with an almost control-like fervor, as long as I still have boots on the ground to keep up the pressure. Or, to put it another way, if it's worth playing, it's worth killing. Goblin Electromancer on turn two? Runaway Steam-Kin at 1/1? Llanowar Elves? They were worth the deck slots, which makes them a threat.

Creatures

One-Drops

Fanatical Firebrand: An aggressive 1/1 with haste that can also be used to pop problem creatures like Siren Stormtamer, Jadelight Ranger, and Dauntless Bodyguard has very few match-ups where it isn't worth the slots.

Skirk Prospector: One of the absolute key pieces in the deck, Prospector allows me to respond to board wipes, ETB effects, and even single-target removal by burning the goblins in question to power a Shock, Lightning Strike, or (jump-started?) Risk Factor. I try not to have more than one on-board at a time, even if it means temporarily locking one in my hand with Frenzy, there's very little benefit to double-dipping, and not having access to one when I need it can rob me of a lot of tempo and flexibility.

Two-Drops

Wily Goblin: The only two-drop creature, Wily replaced Goblin Instigator on a whim, and has done a very good job replacing it. This deck has no shortage of 1/1s, but extra mana that doesn't require a Prospector is much harder to come by. I usually save the treasure for keeping a Frenzy chain going, or firing off a game-winning Banefire, but it can also be used sooner if need be.

Three-Drops

Goblin Chainwhirler: Despite being a very cool and expensive card, the meta has shifted in such a way that Chainwhirler is usually more important for the body than for the board-hit. I usually side him out when facing off against Izzet control, where the one damage is irrelevant and the 3/3 FS body is easily blockable.

Goblin Warchief: I actually took some convincing to run my man Chief. However, being able to turn Frenzy chains into field-wide swings in a single turn is very valuable, not to mention the synergy with Warboss. He's still a little situational, requiring some support to be more than a disappointing bear, but having one come up can help close out a game before an opponent can stabilize.

Legion Warboss: While not the best card in the deck, Warboss is probably my favorite, just because of how much pressure he puts on a control player if he hits the board. A steady chain of 1/1s and a Mentor attacker to pump them even more does a lot of work. In any match-up where there's reliable blockers that the tokens just crash into, it still has synergy with Prospector, where they can be sacked for mana before it gets troublesome.

Secret Legion Warboss combo Show

Because the attack is minor and mandatory, opponents may not think much of throwing a blocker in front of it. A combat trick like Run Amok or damage spell allows for a trade up that I might not otherwise get.

Spells

One-Drops

Shock: No surprise here, Shock can kill problem creatures on the cheap, clear out blockers for big swings, or blast faces for that last bit of reach. It's important to not fire it off turn one just because I can, though, unless I know I need to start racing as soon as possible and there will be few other targets. (Namely, against Boros Angels and Rainbow Lich.)

Two-Drops

Lava Coil: Only two in the mainboard, because the sorcery speed and narrow range of targets can potentially lead to a stall in a Frenzy chain. Still great for permanently removing creatures like Crackling Drake and Arclight Phoenix, or even just using it to kill problem dudes like my other damage spells.

Lightning Strike: Same story as Shock. A four-of is almost mandatory here, if only because it keeps Wildgrowth Walker from becoming a complete and total momentum killer. Fun trick: Using it in response to spells like Deafening Clarion to bring down a creature that my opponent thought was safe.

Run Amok: The versatility of this card is important. Unlike most combat tricks, instead of giving just power and potentially a keyword to make it useful (see: Sure Strike, Trumpet Blast)), the toughness boost from Run Amok also allows it to be a pseudo-modal spell, making a goblin I control tough enough to not be killed by Shock or Clarion. Admittedly, it does nothing against Justice Strike, Seal Away, or any of the gamut of black creature removal, but that's what sideboards are for.

Three-Drops

Risk Factor: The most expensive card in the deck by meatspace cost (as of this writing), Risk Factor provides an excellent instant-speed source to pour mana into. This allows me to respond to board wipes productively, or even to guiltlessly keep mana open for another spell that I suspect I may need to cast. And jump-start makes it even better. As mentioned before, it's a nonbo with Frenzy, but keeping both at three-of keeps that from being an issue too often. (Plus, who knows what might happen when I dump Frenzy with a handful of cards given to me because my opponent didn't think anything of me using the mana on Factor "just because".)

Four-Drops

Experimental Frenzy: Perhaps the truest wincon of the deck, Experimental Frenzy allows me to burn through spells, clear away land draws, and dig for answers or finishers. I would be much more ambivalent about this card if it weren't also removable. I won't be doing it right away, but if the game runs long, spending 3R to effectively make a one-sided Reforge the Soul can be surprisingly clutch. This is especially true if I've been spending unneeded mana on jump-starting Risk Factors, and have not just a full hand, but a hand full of hurt.

Land

Mountain x20: How much land to put in has been a problem I've struggled with quite a bit. However, 20 feels like a good medium. Assuming I can trust Channel Fireball's math, I've still got an average hand size of about 6.5, if I want to have between two and four lands. I could potentially push even lower, but with Risk Factor letting me turn Mountains into spells, I don't feel like it's necessary. And in the other direction, Prospector and Wily letting me hit on-curve three-drops I might otherwise whiff.

Sideboard

Two-Drops

Goblin Cratermaker: This is for two cards in particular: Karn, Scion of Urza, and Treasure Map  . Yes, Treasure Map. Because, again, if it's worth running, it's worth killing. Also, it can pop small dudes, which is nice.

Lava Coil: The other two. Better against control and midrange where I need to deal with strong creatures, but not necessarily the turn they hit the ground.

Sorcerous Spyglass: Lets me scout for wipes, and, more importantly, helps me shut down Vivien Reid, Teferi, Hero of Dominaria, and Karn, Scion of Urza. Potentially, it could also hit Adanto Vanguard and keep it from making itself indestructible, but I've yet to try actually doing that. It's also counter-board against Sentinel Totem and Thrashing Brontodon, though that's even more niche.

Three-Drops

Fiery Cannonade: Explode elves and/or weenies, or at least tries to. Monored doesn't have a lot of good board wipes right now, kind of hoping Ravnica Allegiance will give me more toys. C'mon, Rakdos!

Risk Factor: Better than Frenzy when I'm racing and need to kill a combo player before they can go off.

Four-Drop

Experimental Frenzy: Better than Risk Factor against decks that play the long game, or have good discard access. Basically, anything that knows exactly how it wants to answer the Factor question every time.

X-Drop

Banefire: I tried using Inescapable Blaze here for a while, because I didn't see myself ever casting it for less than six, and liked the instant speed. In the end, though, I realized the real weakness was that I couldn't use it for more than six, severely limiting my ability to close out games that ran long.

Land

Detection Tower: Kind of on the fence about this one. One main, one sided? Just one sided? None at all? It exists for the niche ability to yank hexproof off Carnage Tyrant, Chromium, the Mutable, and Shalai, Voice of Plenty, but also because if I tilt my curve further backwards with spells like Banefire and the fourth Frenzy, I might need that land to help smooth my drops. (And in the other direction, I sometimes side out a Mountain if I'm going super-aggro against combo decks and don't care about Frenzy.)

Final Comments

This is not a flawless deck. That I'm the only person running it might mean I'm the first person to come up with the idea, but more likely it just means I'm being too cute and Johnny about my monored. It's fun to play, though, and being a rogue deck does mean there are some match-ups where my opponent admits they had no idea what to side in against me, and complimented me on making Goblins work. And isn't that what really matter?

Date added	6 years
Last updated	6 years
Legality	This deck is not Standard legal.
Rarity (main - side)	14 - 6 Rares 8 - 7 Uncommons 18 - 2 Commons
Cards	60
Avg. CMC	2.17
Tokens	Goblin 1/1 R, Treasure
Folders	Mazos Goblins