Face Fisted (Commander / EDH MTG Deck)

Face Fisted

Commander / EDH Aggro Multiplayer RG (Gruul) Zoo

DiscoPanda1803

Creature (43)

Land (36)

Instant (4)

Commander (1)

Artifact (6)

Sorcery (5)

Enchantment (4)

Planeswalker (1)

1x Minsc & Boo, Timeless Heroes

Maybeboard

Creature (37)

Enchantment (4)

Artifact (2)

Sorcery (3)

Deck Title:

Metalocalypse: Dethklok - Face Fisted

Lyrics

I am be dangerous now

Not me hurt when stairs fell down

Be pushed by you, me hit head

Me nose broke, soon you be dead

Soon you be dead

So strong my face is

You punch, break fingers

Kick me, you're limping

Stab me, you're bleeding

I am be angerous now

You throwing rock at me

Hit eye and it no hurt me

I'm strong, you're not

You're not

I'm making time for fighting

I'm clearing time for hitting

We'll meet and I will beat you

Our schedules permitting

I pick out fighting outfit

Don't want my pants too tight

Need clothes to breathe to beat you

You'll be beaten down tonight

I'm so fuckin' tough, I'm so fuckin' tough (that's right)

You're an ugly man, you're as dumb as sand

Your mom's fucking fat, your mom blew a rat

You are a mistake, you have sex with cake

You think you're so tough, you're a living bluff

I will put you down, I will make you drown

I will make you bleed, I am filled with speed

I cannot feel pain, I might be insane

I am victory, I write history

Feel my fist

On your face

You hate this

I feel great

One, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight

So strong my face is

You punch, break fingers

Kick me, you're limping

Stab me, you're bleeding

I am be furious now

You say the bad word at me

You pull a string and trip me

I fall down, you run

You run

I am making time for fighting

I think it's time to beat you

I think it's good decision

That I destroy and teach you

You put on very fast shoes

And try to run away

I'm very strong and fast though

You're going down today

You're so fuckin' weak, I'm so fuckin' strong (that's right)

You're an ugly man, you're as dumb as sand

Your mom's fucking fat, your mom blew a rat

You are a mistake, you have sex with cake

You think you're so tough, you're a living bluff

I will put you down, I will make you drown

I will make you bleed, I am filled with speed

I cannot feel pain, I might be insane

I am victory, I write history

Feel my fist

On your face

You hate this

I feel great

You're an ugly man, you're as dumb as sand

Your mom's fucking fat, your mom blew a rat

You are a mistake, you have sex with cake

You think you're so tough, you're a living bluff

I will put you down, I will make you drown

I will make you bleed, I am filled with speed

I cannot feel pain, I might be insane

I am victory, I write history

Introduction:

When i saw Ruric Thar, the Unbowed for the first time i just thought, "this ability is fun as hell". Punish everybody for cast non-creature spells is very fair, but annoying, i try to build this deck with just creatures, but by the end i decide to put non-creatures that are really whorth it, some of those spells are combo pieces as well.

But Gruul always was my favority guild, i just love the aggressivity, so here it is, a standard "Gruul Smash" deck, with a LOT of combat.

Passages of "Rage of the Unsung" history, from "Maze's End":

Rage of the Unsung: passage one

There is a war raging beneath our feet, only it's not one fought with knives and cudgels. It's a silent war fought with growth magic. Selesnya had planted thousands and thousands of saplings, and then accelerated their growth until they had the perfect impenetrable barrier. And they've been leaching magic from our lands to do it, thinking we'd never have the smarts to figure it out.

We wouldn't starve, of course. Even if all the plants and animals in the Rubblebelt died off, there would always be war to feed us. We'd press further into civilization, tearing down Izzet labs and Orzhov basilicas and Azorius training facilities, doing Selesnya's dirty work for them. Meanwhile, they laugh and sing and hold hands within their manufactured gardens, pretending like they are above the "savagery" of fighting.

This. . .this is something that I can get mad about. I feel a spark in my chest, a kindling of Rage waiting to be stoked. Now all I have to do is summon the courage to get the rest of the clan mad about this, too.

Rage of the Unsung: passage two

"I challenge for the position of clan chieftain," I say, legs spread wide, body leaned slightly forward, scowl on my face that could scare off an entire herd of battleboars. Ruric and Thar might not have time to listen to theories about limp grass and brittle bone, but they can't turn down a challenge.

The camp goes silent. It is not the silence of tension, but that of barely contained laughter.

The two-headed ogre sighs, and they rise from their throne of skulls and step up to me. Ruric smiles, revealing a chunk of meat caught between his jagged incisors. "I suppose I could use your scrawny bones as toothpicks. Who says we're uncivilized, see?"

"You're unfit to be our leaders," I say, raising my voice so it cuts through the laughter, and I cling to hope that this altercation will be resolved with the aid of aggressive body language. "The Rubblebelt is practically withering right under your noses, and you don't even bother to look up and ask what's causing it."

"Do you want to fight, or do you plan to bore us to death with your words?" says Thar.

Ruric and Thar step closer. Talking isn't going to work. Violence is all they'll listen to. I throw my whole body behind a punch that lands in their gut, but it gives less than the tree trunk had. Ruric pounds his huge fist on the top of my head, and I crumple to the ground, white spots blooming in my vision. I scramble back up to my feet, struggling to keep the world under me as Ruric and Thar head back to their throne.

Rage of the Unsung: passage three

"If Selesnya wants a war, we'll give them a war," Ruric and Thar say, walking up to me. Ruric reaches out, places his open palm upon my head. Red flames wick up his arm, then set our leaders fully alight. "Stories will be told of this war for generations, and your name, my fierce warrior, will be at the center of them."

Deck Breakdown:

- The Basics

Ramp

Draw

Augur of Autumn (situational, mostly gets lands into the battlefield, as a form of draw. Sometimes creatures to)
Heartwood Storyteller
Selvala, Heart of the Wilds
Professional Face-Breaker (impulsive draw, scrificing a treasure)
Beast Whisperer
Toski, Bearer of Secrets
Neheb, Dreadhorde Champion
Elder Gargaroth
Ohran Frostfang
Ojer Kaslem, Deepest Growth (casting something of your library, land and/or creature)
Kozilek, Butcher of Truth
Sylvan Library
Guardian Project
Smuggler's Surprise
Minsc & Boo, Timeless Heroes
Bonders' Enclave

Interaction

Manglehorn
Reclamation Sage
Druid of Purification
Silverback Elder
Terror of the Peaks (when cretures ETB)
Kogla, the Titan Ape (besides removing artifacts and enchantments, removes through fighting)
Kozilek, Butcher of Truth (annihilator rocks!)
Sword of Feast and Famine: (removal by discarding, it counts)
Beast Within
Decimate
Minsc & Boo, Timeless Heroes (through damage)
Scavenger Grounds (Interaction with the graveyard)

Wrath

Balefire Dragon (throght combat trigger and only for defending player)

Blasphemous Act

Protection

Eternal Witness (protecting by recurring back from the grave)
Guardian Augmenter (protecting the commander)
Saryth, the Viper's Fang (particular good for creatures with vigilence, like the commander)
Lightning Greaves
Sword of Feast and Famine (protection from green and most important from black)
Smuggler's Surprise (situational, only creatures with CMC 5 or greater)
Heroic Intervention
Homeward Path (situational, when opponents steal creatures)

Tutor

- Let the Beatings Begin!

The Beginning

- First Punch

Moraug, Fury of Akoum (combined with any fetch land becames a menace, sometimes a closing game piece all by himself)

Moraug Likes to Fetch

First Beating

Aggravated Assault + Sword of Feast and Famine

Pre-Requisites

Sword of Feast and Famine and Aggravated Assault on the battlefield. Sword of Feast and Famine attached to a creature that can attack this turn. An opponent is unable to block and kill the creature with Sword of Feast and Famine attached. Lands you control can tap to produce at least .

Steps

Deal combat damage to an opponent with the creature that has Sword of Feast and Famine attached.
Sword of Feast and Famine triggers, causing that opponent to discard a card, and you to untap all lands you control.
Proceed to your postcombat main phase.
Activate all mana producing lands you control by tapping them, adding at least .
Activate Aggravated Assault by paying , untapping all creatures you control and causing you to get an additional combat and main phase after this phase.
Repeat.

Results

Infinite combat phases.

Second Beating

Aggravated Assault + Savage Ventmaw

Pre-Requisites

Savage Ventmaw and Aggravated Assault on the battlefield. Savage Ventmaw does not have summoning sickness. An opponent is unable to block and kill Savage Ventmaw.

Steps

Declare Savage Ventmaw as an attacker, attacking an opponent unable to block and kill it.
Savage Ventmaw triggers, adding .
Move to your post-combat main phase.
Activate Aggravated Assault by paying , untapping all creatures you control and causing you to get an additional combat and main phase after this one.

Results

Infinite combat damage.

Infinite combat phases.

Infinite green mana.

Infinite red mana.

Infinite untap of creatures you control.

Third Beating

Aggravated Assault + Selvala, Heart of the Wilds

Pre-Requisites

Aggravated Assault and Selvala, Heart of the Wilds on the battlefield. Selvala, Heart of the Wilds does not have summoning sickness. You control a creature with power seven or greater. available.

Steps

Activate Selvala, Heart of the Wilds to add .
Activate Aggravated Assault, untapping all creatures you control and gaining an addition combat step and post combat mainphase.
Repeat.

Results

Infinite colored mana.

Infinite combat phases.

Fourth Beating

Aggravated Assault + Neheb, Dreadhorde Champion

Pre-Requisites

Neheb, Dreadhorde Champion and Aggravated Assault on the battlefield. You have at least five cards in hand. An opponent cannot block Neheb, Dreadhorde Champion.

Neheb, Dreadhorde Champion does not have summoning sickness.

Steps

Combat damage to an opponent using Neheb, Dreadhorde Champion.
Neheb, Dreadhorde Champion triggers, causing you to discard five cards from your hand, draw five cards, and add .
Move to your postcombat main phase.
Activate Aggravated Assault by paying , causing you to untap all creatures you control and to get an additional combat and main phase after this one.
Repeat.

Results

Infinite draw triggers.

Infinite rummaging.

Infinite self-discard triggers.

Near-infinite combat damage.

Near-infinite combat phases.

Near-infinite untap of creatures you control.

Final Thoghts:

I really love this deck, it's just pure brute ignorance incarnate, and Ruric Thar, the Unbowed accelerate the process with his ability. This deck is particular satisfying to play against those pesky control decks, that i might have a personal gripe with it. Ruric Thar, the Unbowed becomes really annoying if stick in the battlefiel for to long, so when it's removed, the deck can pilot itself into a win, specialy because Ruric Thar, the Unbowed becomes to expensive after just one removal.

The deck is not focus in fetch those combos mentioned above, if they come, they come. I don't usualy run combos in my decks, but infinite combats are just so satisfying, winning with attack, for me, it's the most pure form of Magic.

Note: The maybeboard is composed of cards that i own, but did not make the final list, some of them where in the deck at some point, but for a reason or another was cut. I might put back in, one or other, if i feel the need.

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Date added	4 years
Last updated	6 months
Exclude colors	WUB
Legality	This deck is Commander / EDH legal.
Rarity (main - side)	12 - 0 Mythic Rares 52 - 0 Rares 12 - 0 Uncommons 10 - 0 Commons
Cards	100
Avg. CMC	3.39
Tokens	Beast 3/3 G, Boo, Fanatic of Rhonas 4/4 B, Treasure
Folders	Commander
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