Went out on a high, I guess.
This match report is dedicated to xavrr, for being the only person who has ever admitted to reading one of these things.
[ WNM = Wednesday Night Magic ]
1-1 GW Hardened Scales
This game was a SNOOZE FEST. One of those guys who wants to tell you how good he is at trading (one of my least favourite topics), playing Magic (apparently he has won four tourneys, interestingly I've never heard of him winning once), and just how amazing he is all round at life.
Kept wanting me to play his Modern deck, even though I told him that I didn't have a Modern-viable deck with me.
Kept talking about decks and cards he had played in the past WHILE I WAS TAKING MY TURN. I eventually had to say to him that I needed to concentrate while playing and couldn't do that while he kept prattling on about different cards.
He took soooooo looooong to take each one of his turns. That ended up biting him in the bum because we went to turns and timed out. He clearly would have won the third game. He ended up coming third and I came second so SUCK ON THAT. NEXT TIME YOU MIGHT JUST WANT TO SHUT THE FUCK UP AND PLAY.
First game he had a bad draw. No Hardened Scales hit the field. I was able to burn what Creatures he had and hit him with my Prowess Creatures for a very quick game.
Second game he got Hardened Scales and a good number of Creatures out including two Abzan Falconers. He was able to Outlast both of them and had enough other Creatures out with tokens on that he could keep hitting me with Flying Creatures. Match was over very quickly.
Third game barely got going. He had a Managorger Hydra out that I tried to burn, but he was able to protect. I think I only had a Monastery Swiftspear out, so he would have overrun me.
He did a little preening dance at the end of the game saying that I wouldn't have been able to beat his Hydra, Later on I trotted over between games and showed him a Mob Rule and explained that he could have made his Hydra as big as he liked ... and then I could have taken it and whacked him with it. Dickhead.
2-1 Green Ulamog Ramp
I have played this deck on numerous occasions over the past six months and beaten it every time.
Tonight it got me in the first game by playing two successive Explosive Vegetation cards in the one turn.
That lead to a board wipe of my Creatures by Ugin, the Spirit Dragon, putting Ugin on 4 loyalty counters. I finished him off with an Exquisite Firecraft.
Ulamog, the Ceaseless Hunger followed soon after, hitting me for 10 and milling 20. Then a second Ulamog got played and took my remaining 2 land, basically finishing me off.
In the process I managed to play Crater's Claws for 0 twice, aiming them at my Opponent. He didn't respond. I MEAN COME ON, THAT WAS HILARIOUS!!
It took me a while to Sideboard. I put in Negate and Mob Rule, and sided out Exquisite Firecraft, Crater's Claws, and Jeskai Elder.
He basically had bad draw both games. I did too, but not as bad as him.
Game 2 I was able to get Creatures out early, destroy his Rattleclaw Mystic (which I had left alone in Game 1 to my detriment), and just do a bit of burn here and there to finish things off.
At one point, when I burnt his Rattleclaw Mystic, he went "hah ha!" and played Kozilek's Return. I had out Monastery Swiftspear, and two Stormchaser Mages. I had to explain to him that Prowess triggers on cast, so 2 damage didn't affect any one of my Creatures. He had just killed his Rattleclaw more.
My next turn he played Kozilek's Return before I had a chance to respond, and killed my Monastery Swiftspear. He was only on 4 life so I was kind of like, "whatever". Thinking about it now I might have been able to put something else on the stack, but I didn't need to,
Game 3 was pretty much the same. Burn Rattleclaw Mystic early on, get Creatures out, pump Creatures up while doing direct burn, whack and win.
I felt pretty bad as his face just fell during the last game.
He talks a big game, and he's obviously a Timmy who likes his big Creatures to go bash, bash, but I consider him a friend and didn't like taking him down so easily and see him looking so upset.
2-1 RW Equipment
I played my partner last. Our decks have faced off pretty evenly with each other over the past season.
The deck is here, if you care to check it out: reddy-for-action
He put me square away in the first game getting out a heaps of Creatures, Captain's Claws, and Stoneforge Masterwork, and it was all over very quickly before I could get out enough Creatures to block.
As the game was playing out I remembered that I can only ever beat him once I Sideboard. I boarded in Radiant Flames and Mob Rule.
I started the game with both of those cards in hand.
He started hitting the board fast and, by Turn 3, had Monastery Swiftspear, Weapons Trainer, and Monastery Mentor out on the field.
I did a wipe with Radiant Flames.
He then played two lots of Hordeling Outburst over the next two turns, which gave him six Creatures. He hit me with all of them. For some reason I had all my Creatures tapped down.
I tried to Fiery Impulse one Goblin, just to lessen the damage a bit. He played Make a Stand. I was on 13 life, so he hit me for 12, leaving me on 1.
I untapped my Monastery Swiftspear and Stormchaser Mage, then played Mob Rule. I can't remember what life he was on. Something like 7. I basically took all his blockers away and whacked him for 10.
He was not impressed. He said that was an "embarrassing" way for me to win. I chuckled.
Next game was very similar. I don't remember it that well, except that I used Mob Rule again at the end to win.
I got chided all the way home.
Hey, whatever works, I say.
Not once tonight did I get to do any damage with Wandering Fumarole. Bit of a shame as that usually helps me garner the win.
My only regret, as this deck cycles out, is that I did not remember to ever call Monastery Swiftspear "Taylor".
The thing I DON'T regret is not hearing people say to me, "You know what you should do with this deck? Put Slip Through Space, Expedite, Titan's Strength, and Temur Battle Rage in it".
If I wanted to play the same damn generic UR Prowess deck as everybody else is then sure, I should do that.
I happen to like a bit of originality.
This deck has been amazing. Nobody has expected the tricks it has up its sleeve. It has gotten into the Top 8 every tournament I have played with it. I will miss playing it, although I am ready for something new.
Next stop: Cast a Shadow