Land (25)
Enchantment (4)
Artifact (8)
Instant (15)
Sorcery (2)
I would like to welcome everybody to the Carnival of Destruction and Doom! I'm your guide for the day, you can call me Bolas, Nicol or just Master as I'm used to be called!
Right as you step in, you will notice the rugged terrain that is the foundation of the whole facility! We have this beautiful terrain full of muddy and dark waters, do ignore the skulls hanging from some trees, it is after all a bit Swampy. The beautiful Mountain range and the cold waters surrounding our Islands of doom can also help you relax and take a break from causing so much devastation and annihilation! The background cries of pain just make it all so much relaxing! Or, you can always sit down at our main tavern Blood Crypt, our museum Watery Grave and our sauna Steam Vents! If that's too much for you, you can go to our Temple of Malice or Temple of Deceit and learn of our story, maybe even get killed.... I mean blessed!
Now, first I'm gonna explain our abilities. We at the Carnival take great pleasure in causing pain and horror.
For the great deal of preparation, we have slaves to do some Divination for us. It's not the fastest, nor the most efficient way, but it's still something. It can at times give us some advantage, which is always good when you want to increase the suffering!
We also like to bore the feeling of dread in people. Dreadbore-ing is always fun. A cheap way to entertain us. And really efficient!
We also like to entertain our guests with our fireworks show! Most of the time they die quickly or as soon as they enter the show! Sometimes we like to hold it back to cause even more devastation! Just go to the field over there that says Mizzium Mortars target practice and stay still!
With the addition of new members every year, we managed to learn how to seize thoughts. Thoughtseize-ing always makes the opponent cringe. And we just laugh at the small pinch we feel from intruding into their minds!
At times you might also hear a loud roar, maybe even huge footsteps and cries of pain along with countless imps! But don't fret, that's just our dear friend from Ravnica getting out of the Blood Crypt all drunk and stuff. Rakdos's Return can always cause grief and most of the time will empty your minds!
At times when I feel as if there are too many people or items around, I like to have a few handy ways of cleaning up. Maids are expensive, but natural disasters are not, therefore a Cyclonic Rift can help me. I can either target it at one pesky thing, or just blast everything away after a while! Everyone wins! Well, me mostly...
If I catch you guys doing something good though, I will definitely order you Far / Away so be careful! Don't be a hero, or you'll experience the Hero's Downfall! I might even not waste my time and let a Lightning Strike kill you off or whoever sent you.
Oh and here are our entertainers! We have our friend Master of Cruelties! He and his flamingo like to entertain the planeswalkers we've caught trying to foil our evil plans and ways by torturing them until they're on the brink of death and letting me decide what to do with them! He's awesome, high-five! And here's our main threat of the day, the Desecration Demon , he likes to eat corpses and graves. Don't let him get hungry, or he will destroy you quickly, ripping you up faster the more you've fed him!
And here are our main guys. The ones that keep this place running. The ones which cause fear and doom with their mere presence!
Ashiok, Nightmare Weaver, best thing I could find, some even claim it might be part of me since the old days when I faked my own death! Really amazing, he/she likes to dig into your thoughts and then conjure your worst nightmares into the reality! He/she is also really fun when he gets to destroying your thoughts and your memories! I like him a lot. And he/she will be staying here for a while as well, such a good boy/girl!
Next we have our friends from Ravnica, Ral Zarek and Jace, Architect of Thought.
Ral is a really good slav... I mean friend of mine. He likes to blast things with fire, he enjoys slowing down all who oppose me, he likes to help me go faster with my evil plans. And at times, he can even stop time for my adversaries so that I can continue inflicting more and more pain on them until they give up and die! He really is a swiss-knife in a human body! Such a shame that he goes from one dragon to another and has to serve them or else will be eaten. Fate is a cruel thing, that's why I like fate.
As for Jace, I found him on the streets of Ravnica, apparently he was heartbroken by a girl called Emmara or something. Weird thing love, can cause so much pain. But it can also cause happiness so not touching that. Back to him, apparently he was tortured by a slave of mine, good ol' Tezzeret. Which is fine, I tortured both of them so it doesn't matter. Jace might be constantly depressed and seeking love and affection, but he can't find it here. He helps though. He can stop pesky little critters from knocking on my door, he gives me good ideas many times as well. And if the time is right, he gets a really brilliant idea and integrates him in the plan on his own! Good job, old friend! Such a shame that I will still eat you soon.
That there is our warehouse, we like to stock our unused toys for when the time is right. We have three portraits which always trigger the Anger of the Gods for when we need to halt our pesky adversaries from bothering us if they manage to breach into the Carnival. We used to enjoy dissolving things, but we just keep it for those noisy guys which can actually be a bigger threat than expected. Gainsay also likes to silence people, especially those pesky blue guys. Alas, the annoying blue guys might just start singing "I'm blue da ba dee da ba die" to which I normally just laugh and use our good Izzet toy, the Counterflux and continue causing some more chaos. If it goes too slow, I might reconfigure Jace to be a good offensive toy, the same way I tampered with Tezzeret's mind, switching his personality to Jace, Memory Adept. Last but not least, if I see an Elspeth, Sun's Champion or AEtherling trying to disguise themselves and enter, I just return the local Rakdos Guild's games, the Slaughter Games .
But enough chit-chat for now, do enjoy your stay! Why are you looking at me like that? What did you expect, this place is full of corpses, people dying and evil things. You want your money back and to leave? Oh, such a shame. Alas, you can't leave and your money is funding our Carnival. Don't worry, soon your souls, bones and flesh will as well! I've got some work so do excuse me, ta ta!
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| Date added | 10 years |
| Last updated | 10 years |
| Legality | This deck is not Standard legal. |
| Rarity (main - side) | 10 - 0 Mythic Rares 18 - 0 Rares 11 - 0 Uncommons 5 - 0 Commons |
| Cards | 60 |
| Avg. CMC | 3.29 |
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