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The Tumblr Deck: White Girls Getting Triggered

Modern Aggro Humans Lifegain RW (Boros) Soul Sisters Theme/Gimmick

lexleningrad


Sideboard


Maybeboard

Enchantment (1)


THE TUMBLR DECK


Thanks to everyone for making this the #1 Boros Soul Sisters deck on Tappedout.net!
Tumblr Girls are all I want.(Pictured: Our opponent after 100 Myr tokens slam in with Legion Loyalist)

Description

Do you like triggering white girls? Boy, have I got the deck for you. We're gonna be gainin' life, makin' tokens, hitting in with huge pussies (the feline kind), and burninating the countryside.

By the time we're done onlookers won't be sure if we are playing commander with the life totals and board states this ridiculous deck can create. Grab yourself a chair, a playset of Norin the Wary and let's get started.


Deck Breakdown


Key Combos

Auriok Champion+Soul Warden+Soul's Attendant are our basic bitches who get triggered by the ever-recurring shitlord of spiciness Norin the Wary gaining us all kinds of life.

Set up a few Genesis Chamber for our tumblrinas to interact with and pretty soon you'll have an army of Myrs at your disposal, but we're all for equality here so your opponent will get to join in the fun as well.

Then at haste speed Legion Loyalist sneaks round the back, opening the floodgates for all all-out assault. If he can't make it we can always tunnel underneath with a Rogue's Passage

Ajani's Pridemate is one cool cat meme to have on your side with all the life gain shenanigans. Champion of the Parish gets swole hitting dem gains hard for those ladies, including a daily dose of Norin the Wary human growth hormone 'roids.

Purphoros, God of the Forge ♬♬ It's getting hot in here, so take off all your clothes ♬♬


Creatures

Norin the Wary Our fearless ...erm, fearful commander. The legendary trigger master makes the deck run, when playing the deck don't worry about casting another if you have one already in play, he's already near impossible to get rid of (removal spells with split second can't kill Norin, split second does not stop trigger abilities from triggering) and it gives you another trigger. The battlefield Norin will trigger and exile itself, then the Norin on the stack resolves. Attack or cast more spells to get the fresh Norin to exile himself. At the end of the turn, both Norins come back in. The legend rule will kick in and you have to choose one of them to keep. You'll want to get a white girl out front first to get max value.

Auriok Champion The queen of the Mean Girls, protection from black and red shuts down a lot of counters to this combo.

Soul Warden Pumpkin spice latte is her fave.

Soul's Attendant Oh, my, god. Becky, look at her butt.

Smuggler's Copter Crew up with Norin and hit the autopilot as he ejects right at combat.

Ajani's Pridemate Our giant pussy, with all the ETB triggers going off (don't miss the ones off your opponent!) this guy can get huuuge very quickly.

Legion Loyalist So, your opponent got a ton of myrs? So what? March on right past them while giving your huge dudes trample.

Ranger of Eos Cis-Scumlord extrodinare of tiny creatures, when he hits the field you are almost guaranteed to have some kind of trigger combo online.

Archangel of Thune: Badass nazi-stomping bitch.

Enchantments

Spirit Bonds More ETB effects? Spirits for our white girls to contact with ouija boards or some shit? Indestructible creatures? Yes. Please.

Purphoros, God of the Forge "So, you're telling me each time a creature enters the battlefield... I loose 2 life?" Muhahahaha. His other ablities are pretty much there for show, and he's not becoming a creature any time soon.

Instants

Lightning Bolt I once tazed someone on the tongue, I guess this is kind of what it was like.

Path to Exile Hey, where

Planeswalkers

Elspeth, Knight-Errant +1 For an ETB and a token or, +1 to launch 90 kg creature over 300 meters. The super basically wins the game 99% of the time it can go off.

Artifacts

Genesis Chamber Myr tokens are like, what, 7 cents? Buy at least 50... trust me.


Sideboard

Blood Moon The land's coagulated and my mind's incarcerated but my helmet's ventilated... BLOOD OCEAN.

Leyline of Sanctity C-C-C Combo Breaker!

Crumble to Dust: Anti-Tron tech.

Path to Exile Bolts not getting the job done?

Rest in Peace Playing Dredge is to Magic as masturbation is to sex.

Sanctimony Trigger a burn player today! Also absolutely hilarious with Blood Moon.

Stony Silence I get Affinity, but just no.

Wear / Tear Probably one of my favorite spells, don't forget you can fuse cast it!


Let me know what you think! If you enjoyed please upvote and check out my other Modern decks:
GET PUCKED: 5/5 Indestructible Hockey Pucks
Modern: Bigger Blacker and Uncut
ICYBOIS
Stoned in Prison
GLOBAL WARMING.

TRIGGERED

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Revision 5 See all

(7 years ago)

+1 Auriok Champion main
-1 Crumble to Dust side
-1 Smuggler's Copter main
Top Ranked
  • Achieved #1 position overall 7 years ago
Date added 7 years
Last updated 7 years
Exclude colors UBG
Legality

This deck is Modern legal.

Rarity (main - side)

5 - 3 Mythic Rares

28 - 8 Rares

11 - 4 Uncommons

10 - 0 Commons

Cards 60
Avg. CMC 1.95
Tokens Emblem Elspeth, Knight-Errant, Myr 1/1 C, Soldier 1/1 W, Spirit 1/1 W
Folders terrible things to do, Favorites, Modern, Good looking decks, to build one day..., Competitive, Ideas for Decks, Nice, Andres decks, favs
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