A Polymorphist's Jest Story
The Blind Eternities forum
Posted on July 31, 2014, 10:10 p.m. by itsdarsh
Upon her travels through the Multiverse to find answers to the Eldrazi scourge of Zendikar, Nissa Revane heard rumors of a great polymorphist who could be able to aid her cause. Eventually, Nissa found this polymorphist - a curious woman named Jalira who called herself a "Master Polymorphist."
"Hello, what brings you here?" asked Jalira as she opened the door to her lab for the planeswalker.
"I'm Nissa Revane, of Zendikar. My homeland is facing total devastation from a race of faceless titans known as the Eldrazi. Their three leaders cannot stay dead, and I need to find a way to imprison them on another plane. I've heard you could aid me?"
The polymorphist looked amused. "These Eldrazi are creatures, correct?"
"I suppose so," responded Nissa.
"Come in and make yourself comfortable. I believe I have just the answer." Nissa walked into the lab as Jalira went through a door to what seemed to be a storageroom. The Worldwaker took in her settings: containers full of pure aether with regular creatures. She walked over to a cage with a mink in it and was alarmed when the label to the cage read "Subj. 179: Rootwater Alligator, Dominaria." Perhaps it was a mistake to trust someone so in tune with blue mana.
After some time, Jalira walked out, holding a container. The only thing inside the container was a blue frog.
"Okay, so what's the solution?" asked a perplexed Nissa.
Jalira only smiled, and pointed at the frog.
"That's it. A frog. A frog is going to kill the most powerful beings in the Multiverse," said Nissa flatly.
"Well, not quite. You see..."
"I've heard enough. This is the last time I trust someone who relies on blue mana." Nissa left Jalira's lab, then traveled to Ravnica.
Jalira simply looked at the shut door and smiled, then to the frog. "They can't all be winners, can they, Progenitus?"
TheAmazingSalsa says... #4
Schuesseled Let's just say she won't be reprinted anytime soon
August 1, 2014 3:09 a.m.
Schuesseled aegis of the gods then barged in and gave her the finger and raided her fridge and stole all her booze
August 1, 2014 8:43 a.m.
Nigeltastic says... #6
Okay I thought this would be a thread about a huge blowout with the card Polymorphist's Jest but it ended up being hilarious instead. Well played.
GoldGhost012 says... #2
This made me chuckle. Kudos.
July 31, 2014 11:53 p.m.