How do you Relax?
The Blind Eternities forum
Posted on Nov. 8, 2014, 9:02 p.m. by Scorprix
So, I just got out of a really annoying argument with my mother, and I'm kinda pissed off right now. So now comes the phase were I try to cool off.
Usually I'd go watch some "how I met your mother", but just earlier today I finished the 2 last episodes (yea, they were bad, and honestly, a total let down). So, I went back on Netflix, and looked for "modern family", which was my backup plan. However, it didn't seem to be on Netflix (I could have SWORN I had seen it on there earlier!).
So, now I ask of you, what is the best way of letting off steam?
Netflix does change what it has on it occasionally. Things come and go.
November 8, 2014 9:07 p.m.
VampireArmy says... #5
In times of extreme frustration i beat the shit out of a pillow. Don't get there often but when i do it's probably amusing. In the other hand around people i close my eyes and count backwards from ten. Do that enough and you might begin to rationalize away the anger. Idk if that works for everyone but hey that's me
November 8, 2014 9:12 p.m.
julianjmoss says... #6
i mean you probably should do this but I get high and cook food. Maybe just do the second part. And I dont mean binge eat or anything but like, sit down and find a recipe and make it (not cereal like a real recipe)
November 8, 2014 9:12 p.m.
mowservision says... #7
I usually smoke and then eat, but if that isn't your cup of tea, you can just eat. Food triggers a survival reward circuitry in the brain.
November 8, 2014 9:17 p.m.
Personally, and I mean I'm way behind alot, but I've been watching Always Sunny in Philidelphia. Most people have seen that show to death, but I didn't find it till like a year ago and I've been gentle with it. If you into anime, Samurai Champloo is friggin amazing. It's funny and badass at the same time, just remember to switch it to english without subtitles. But understand that despite how popular it was when it came out on Adult Swim, the creatures refused to make another season and dilute the product, so once the story is over, its just kind of over. I'm a sports guy, so The League is one of my favorite shows. It's loosely about this group of people that play fantasy football, but really its just really funny. You don;t need to know anything about football for it to be funny. There is always the first few seasons of the Walking Dead, and the complete Breaking Bad, if your as far behind as I am. Venture Bros. is a pretty classic Adult Swim cartoon, consistently funny. I've heard good things about Trailer Park Boys, but I've never actually seen it. Can't get enough Futurama. I would HIGHLY recommend watching Bo Burnham's stand up, which I believe is still on Netflix. One of the funniest dam things I've ever seen. Supernatural is a decent show, I've only seen a few episodes, but I'm always pretty locked in when I see it. 30 Rock is also pretty funny along the same lines as How I met Your Mother. That should get you started.
November 8, 2014 9:19 p.m.
@VampireArmy: Seems better than my current strategy, which at this point seems to be saying something profane about the person every 20 seconds. :P
@julianjmoss: Sorry if this is irritating, but you know that drugs are terrible for your health, right? They LITERALLY kill you. Slow as it might be, it's a terrible way to die.
@supercaptainpow: Ok, so now I know eating is a good idea. But, once again, smoking, like drugs, is REALLY bad for you. :')
@DarkHero: Ahh, good ol' Philadelphia! Tried watching the first episode, bu it was kinda' weird. Allready watched all futurama, because, you know, it's futurama. : )
November 8, 2014 9:24 p.m.
julianjmoss says... #10
Scorprix i dont mean to start an argument but everything in moderation is ok. Not to mention I don't do hard drugs, just smoke weed occasionally. There really isnt enough research showing the negative effects of smoking weed but I eat healthy and work out regularly.
But thanks mom ;)
November 8, 2014 9:27 p.m.
Ignore the weed arguement. this is the internet. you're not gonna win.
why not just go for a walk? it's perfect for letting off steam.
November 8, 2014 9:29 p.m.
GlistenerAgent says... #12
I play Magic. Seriously. Thinking about something completely irrelevant to whatever bothers you is an awesome way to calm yourself down. Being in high school, I have neither the desire nor the ability to procure and consume drugs, so at least I've got that going for me. :)
If you're looking for a new show to watch, The Legend of Korra is a show that I think you could easily smash through four seasons of.
November 8, 2014 9:30 p.m.
julianjmoss says... #13
Let me just say that I am not trying to influence you to do drugs, thats why in my first post i said you probably shouldnt do them. What I was basically getting at with cooking is that you should find an outlet to channel your frustration or anger into something productive. Sitting down and binge watching tv shows like half of these people suggested is just as unhealthy as me consuming drugs every once and a while.
November 8, 2014 9:33 p.m.
EndStepTop says... #14
I've played bass for 6 nearly 7 years. Busting out death metal songs is a great way to blow off steam. Really any activity/hobby you enjoy works.
November 8, 2014 9:36 p.m.
Nigeltastic says... #15
As a complete side note, you must live in an interesting place, GlistenerAgent, I knew so many people in high school who both procured and provided drugs to others (not that it interested me at all, but I don't judge).
November 8, 2014 9:36 p.m.
Whenever i'm in the need to relax, I like to put on some soothing music, such as Yiruma (A Piano artist), and just lay down and meditate. Meditation is a wonderful thing.
November 8, 2014 9:43 p.m.
VampireArmy says... #17
Bro i grew up in southern California. Tried it once, didn't like it. Didn't stop people from offering it though. To this day I'm sure i could get at least ten people arrested on the spot...but i value my life so I won't.
Honestly the research I've seen shows it affects the ability to retain memory and focus along with lung issues if you spend years doing it. Is this data conclusive? Possibly not but it's something. Obviously i don't condemn or encourage it. I just grew up around a lot of it and thus developed a healthy understanding of its perks and draw backs.
November 8, 2014 9:46 p.m.
julianjmoss says... #18
I understand, but I'm not a chronic user, I maintain healthy lifestyles along with it and it annoys me a little that the first thing out of his mouth is condemnation but oh well. It's actually decriminalized where I live anyways so it's not like I'm breaking the law.
November 8, 2014 9:49 p.m.
fleishdawg says... #19
I drink tea and listen a "Turnabout Jazz Soul" playlist on Youtube that I'd LIKE to link, but Tappedout won't let me script tag, so hurmph.
I'd also recommend (since I saw Netflix mentioned earlier) watching House of Cards. The show is quite fantastic.
Feel better!
November 8, 2014 9:49 p.m.
CommanderOfBolas says... #20
When I get frustrated, I tell my pet dragon to release the Eldrazi from Ugin's trap. But that's just me. I also go for long walks or brew some magic decks. I know a lot of people who turn to drugs/alcohol, and they didn't turn out so well, so its good to hear that you don't use. anyway, I hope everything turns out alright for you
November 8, 2014 9:49 p.m.
miracleHat says... #21
As a person who suffers severely from anger management issues, here is my advice.
1st: Don't get carried away. That is how you put yourself into stupid situations. It doesn't matter if it isn't on the internet, with friends, family, or work.
2nd: Don't do anything that would be difficult. For me, I like doing mazes, but when i am in, "that terrible mood", i try and stray away from the harder mazes.
3rd: Food is some of the best medicine. Spicy food is the best. The heat from the food (straight chilies are the best) releases dopamine from your brain.
4th: Exercise. Like food (spicy), it releases dopamine.
5th: There is always another day. As I said in the 1st, please, please don't do anything stupid.
November 8, 2014 9:49 p.m.
Thank you guys for SO much help! :D
Does anyone know any way to completely dismiss the anger quickly without food and that does not require too much time?
November 8, 2014 10 p.m.
VampireArmy says... #23
The things i first mentioned work on the spot :D
November 8, 2014 10:05 p.m.
As corny as it sounds, meditate. Cross your legs, close your eyes. Do not move. Take deep breaths and imagine yourself in an infinite white area. You are sitting nowhere, you feel nothing, you are absolutely relaxed and calm. You feel nothing. Deep Breaths. Continue this for 30 sec. to a minute, and slowly open your eyes, one final deep breath. memorize this and say it or think it to yourself as you are in your space. Works every time
November 8, 2014 10:19 p.m.
@VampireArmy: Oh yea! I'll try steady breathing next time. Seems like a good Idea! :D
@Asher18: Meditation seems like a cool idea. : )
Ok, so how does this sound:
First, count backwards down from ten until I become calm, then meditate a bit, eat a bit of something healthy (preferably a little somethin' spicy), then take a walk. : )
I've always had some anger issues, and this seems like it may help. Thanks guys! :D
November 8, 2014 10:37 p.m.
MindAblaze says... #26
I think whatever you do, don't ignore it. People get angry and they often bottle it up. Mindfulness and mediation will let you feel the discomfort and let you become acclimatized to it so you can more easily let it go. Nothing will work instantly and allow it to stay gone.
As an addiction worker with a self-proclaimed anger problem and history with drugs, you have to be careful how you choose to deal with it. But these guys have given you some pretty good advice I think, there's not much else to say.
November 8, 2014 10:42 p.m.
ducttapedeckbox says... #27
Echoing what MindAblaze! said, don't ignore it. Let yourself cool down for a bit (regardless of which method you use) and then sit down and think about why you're angry. If you start to get worked up again, stop. Find something else to do and come back to it an hour or two later.
When you can comfortably sit down and think about it, try to see both sides. While you may not always agree with what others say, there's often a view you're not considering. Try to see the situation from someone else's shoes - whether it be those of the person you were arguing with or just a general third party view, this can usually calm you down. You still may not agree with what was said, but at least you'll have an idea of why it was said.
This usually works for me, so I hope it helps you too. As for what to do in the time you're trying to take your mind off of your anger, do something productive and that will keep you busy. Honestly I find myself doing homework sometimes to take my mind off things because it requires me to focus. Do work for a subject you're comfortable with though, don't need a pesky problem to stress you out. Or, just come on here and look through some decks!
Just my two cents, but figured I'd share.
November 8, 2014 10:55 p.m.
Good luck. Anger isn't something I deal with on a regular basis...I'm normally pretty chill. But while I do have a long fuse, whem I go off...its bad. Haha. In all honesty the fastest thing I've found is music. I don't play, unfortunately I have 0 artistic ability. I listen to music and zone out. Think of one thing or one hundred, however your mind works. I generally focus on plotting out a new magic deck, or the next time I get to take my son to the park. These help me. But you have to find what calms you. TV is not a healthy outlet, but it is efficient. Most things in moderation are tolerable if not beneficial. I say most because I am not an advocate of any addictive substance for myself. But that's just me. What people put in their bodies is their own business...I just drink some Sweet tea, or earl grey depending on my mood and plot the next magical destructive force my friends have to face. Reading also helps...but that's kind of fading in popularity lately...unfortubately.
November 8, 2014 11:10 p.m.
CrazyLittleGuy says... #30
That's my secret, captain; I'm always relaxed.
But really, it's very easy when and if you stop caring about things happening around and within you. It also becomes easy to avoid/ignore arguments if you don't care about the topic. I used to have anger issues, until I realized nothing should even matter that much. Everything in stride.
I don't advocate this method of not caring particularly as it may lead to lack of motivation in life. Works for me though.
November 9, 2014 12:16 a.m.
MindAblaze says... #31
We believe in nothing!
Seriously though, it's more about replacing blame with acceptance than "not caring" although that's what it can feel like.
My moms a controlling, passive aggressive enabler...but when I can put it on her it takes a lot of the frustration away. Asking "why...?" just pisses you off.
November 9, 2014 1:12 a.m.
VampireArmy says... #32
Quite honestly, when I sit down to think about why people are the way they are or why they treat others the way they do I tend to just get even more frustrating. For example. I get into it from time to time with my Gf's step-dad's Gf as we all live together. I know the reason me and her don't click in the slightest is because we are both abrasive passive aggressive people with severe anxiety disorders (though not the same). She doesn't like loud voices and I don't enjoy being touched. What happens? She ends up playfully swatting my head and I raise my voice. Yep. idk how the hell any of this is relevant but there it be folks. learn about nothing 0.0
November 9, 2014 1:19 a.m.
Femme_Fatale says... #33
My things that I do.
1) Do something else that takes the mind away from whatever angered me.
2) Watch something funny.
3) Talk to the people I love.
4) Listen to some Jazz.
5) Play a video game.
6) Cook some food.
7) Clean the house.
8) Study/work on projects.
9) Shadowbox.
10) When all else fails, I spend an hour engulfing my mind in ASMR. ASMR hypnotism was the last I did, and ... wow.
November 9, 2014 5:02 a.m.
Joebobpickle says... #34
Whenever I get really mad I actually just find a good book and read. It helps me think about what I've done and gives me some time to myself. What is ASMR?
November 9, 2014 11:42 a.m.
I'm not often angry, but when I am, I typically try to distract myself. Comedy is great and usually pretty fast. I recommend standup, there's a ton on Netflix. If you want a series, American Dad, Futurama, Family Guy are good if you want something mindless. Chuck is good if you want an actual show.
You could also listen to really loud music while taking a nap. Dream Theater and Kamelot are pretty easy to fall asleep to while not being obnoxious when loud. They're not extreme like a lot of metal music.
YouTube is also a thing. You can waste hours without even knowing what you're doing. Cinema Sins will do the job.
November 9, 2014 2:42 p.m.
Just remembered, look up something that strikes your curiosity. You don't have to do any hardcore research, but sometimes I'll just look up an actor on Wikipedia, find something in filmography, and just go from there.
Admittedly, everything I'm saying only distracts you from your anger and gives you time to cool down. It doesn't actually deal with your issues. I can't help you there. I'm no Iroh.
November 9, 2014 2:46 p.m.
vampirelazarus says... #37
I play music REALLY LOUDLY.
I've also noticed I'm the opposite of many here.
When angry, I listen to metal.
Metal soothes me.
When calm, I listen to jazz.
Jazz gets me moving :P
Seriously, I can fall asleep to Fleshgod Apocalypse, but put on some David Brubeck, and I won't sleep until I can play every song on the album.
November 9, 2014 2:56 p.m.
VampireArmy says... #38
apologies folks. I wrote that after taking some sleep inducing cold medicine. (Had a chest cold for the last 3 weeks)
November 9, 2014 5:49 p.m.
sleep
sublimation (do some arts or crafts or music or otherwise something creative)
November 9, 2014 5:58 p.m.
Dalektable says... #40
Immediately, I go downstairs (if I'm home) and beat my punching bag for awhile. Then, when I realize that doesn't work, I try to chill and listen to some music for awhile. Watching a comedy usually works as well. I would assume playing an instrument would work well, but unfortunately I only sing and find that doesn't go well or help much when im angry.
November 9, 2014 7:57 p.m.
Femme_Fatale says... #41
I can't be explained Joebobpickle, at least not by me. You have to experience it. Thus, google.
November 10, 2014 12:51 a.m.
Gorgosaurusrex says... #42
If I need to relax I'll open a good beer and either play some video games (Gran Turismo/Call of Duty/Age of Empires/Skyrim/Whatever) or play guitar. Both things get me in a very relaxed mood.
I've also found that taking a drive on some back roads with a good album on can relieve stress. Driving at night is particularly relaxing.
Scorprix: When I get angry I stop and think about what good being angry does for me. Once I come to the conclusion that getting angry has absolutely zero rational benefit the feeling can be dismissed easily. My wife thinks that I'm secretly Vulcan, lol.
November 10, 2014 5:35 p.m.
Femme_Fatale says... #43
"I can't be explained, at least not by me. You have to experience it. Thus, google."
You know, the meaning behind that entire sentence was completely altered by the fact that I missed the t right after the I at the very beginning. So I apparently I cannot explain myself, and you have to experience me as an object. And apparently you do this by doing a google search ... such weirdness.
November 10, 2014 6:05 p.m.
Femme_Fatale says... #44
Oh, and another thing that is really good for relaxing is doing a tea ceremony. Specifically, drink Chamomile.
November 10, 2014 6:06 p.m.
ThisIsBullshit says... #45
Lol Femme_Fatale I was really confused for a second and then you pointed out your error. The funniest part was I took it in stride and thought you were serious.
Also to everyone else: I guess I know what to do next time I get into a fight with my dad. Nothing pisses me off more than being so angry I start crying tears of rage.
Being a girl sucks.
November 10, 2014 7:15 p.m.
Femme_Fatale says... #46
It gets better when you leave your parents Tibbles.
November 10, 2014 7:39 p.m.
vampirelazarus says... #47
Femme, can I experience you as an object???
I'd be down to be an object for you, in exchange.
DarkHero says... #2
I mean I play video games usually. kind of escape reality. I could give you some Netflix suggestions...
November 8, 2014 9:06 p.m.