"Perfect Johnny" - episode 1

Challenges and Articles forum

Posted on June 1, 2016, 10:17 p.m. by Wiktul

Hello everyone! Here comes the very first article of upcoming series called "Perfect Johnny" (refering to myself). In this cycle I shall focus on the cards from various formats and expansions that are, could or should be significantly interesting for anyone who consider himself at least a little bit a Johnny-type of a player.

Some boring explanation of why this thread and why myself Show

Why am I starting this series?

As a journalist with more than 8 years of experience in writting about various topics that can be described as "Fantasy" I simply can not hold back any longer. Moreover, my local MTG community is highly (wannabe)competitive and I find it H I D E O U S L Y difficult to talk with anyone about anything that was not present on some GP Uzbekistan Top 8 list.

What am I starting this series for?

Simple as it can be - to share some thoughts and ideas, to find some discussion, arguing (without hating) and general fun. Eventually, having some experience in making use of so called junk (not Jund, make no mistake about that) in various enviroments (from the kitchen table with deck made of scraps to Legacy with tier 1 decks) maybe I will be able to provide some ideas that could be of further use for any of you.

What do I hope for?

Any sort of attention. One fair comment will be as good reward for me as would be one hundred. I hope to make a single episode at least once a month, maybe more if in longer term you'll find it worthy of your time. And most of all - I hope you will enjoy it, no matter if you'll agree with it or not.

Ok, that's enough for the introduction. Round 1!

"Perfect Johny" - episode 1: Why is The Thing not really a thing?

I love krakens. My Gatherer shortcut on my favourites toolbar defalut search is set on "kraken". Quest to break Modern is one of my most beloved creations, tested and improved over the years. I have almost all krakens, leviathans, octopusses and serpens ever printed. Knowing all this, imagine my emotional state when I saw the full spoiler of Shadows over Innistrad - the set so strictly and strongly based of my favourite lovecraftian horrors (if you didn't get it - my profile name is not some random set of letters).

Thing in the Ice  ^Flip

I've nearly lost my eye due to my own erection. Kraken Horror- could it be anny better? Such a magestic, nasty, tricky, destructive, little... amm... enormous bastard. Such a great tribute to Dark Depths and Ludevic's Test Subject  ^Flip. I love this! Haven't seen anything so Johnny-playable in the Standard since Assault Formation so... What?!

What is the price?!

In pre-order and just after pre-release people tended to demand even about 15$ for it. Everyone was like "OMFG, control is going to be so broken now!". I (perhaps the only Johnny around my venue swarming with Spikes) had my doubts though and, considering all the hype and the price, was...

...like this Show

Yesterday I bought my copy of Thing in the Ice  ^Flip for less than a half of it's cost from the first days of SOI. How did it happen? Why a card like this did not awake the horror over the top decks in the format? And finally, why I'm not running it in my own Johnny-control Standard deck, that is kicking the tops really solid without it?

In a first impression, TiTi seems like a perfect early-game drop for control deck. Fetches are out of the format, tempo is lower, you can afford to tap-out turn 2 and then counter or remove anything further just to flip it around turn 4 or 5.

The problem is, that in most cases you're simply throwing it into a graveyard with random suspend. Ultimate Price, Grasp of Darkness, Silkwrap, Declaration in Stone, To the Slaughter or Stasis Snare will surely take care of it in an instant, as will Reflector Mage or Fleshbag Marauder. You can't defend it without a Negate or Dispel in hand, and even if you do Dispel some removal eot your turn 3, there's probably going to be another after opponent's untap. Casting it turn 4 or 5 is also not the best option.

Turn 4 or 5 is usually the best and highest time for a control deck to cast some Languish or Planar Outburst in order of not getting overrun by some token legion and other aggresive aggro-crap. Killing TiTi yourself seems like a dumb idea, and not doing it with boardwipe in the midgame would probably mean that you're trying hard to focus on spot-removal (like those mentioned above) and / or countering all possible threats. Good idea, but not very possible indeed.

If you haven't languished enemy creatures untill the mid-game (let's assume you're facing some kind of a mid-range), the ones that are coming for you will either endure Languish or be replaced by another, equally significant threat. There is no possiblity, even for a control deck highly focused on counterspells, to counter what can't be removed, remove what wasn't countered, protect basically vanilla permanent like TiTi's day side (no hexproof, regeneration etc.) AND the player himself over the course of a single turn.

Moreover, it's Standard, so no Miracle-like average of control is going to happen. If you'll waste all of - let's say - 3 or 4 counterspells you've obtained untill turn 5-6 only to protect your frozen kraken, your life will drop drastically. Due to this, you'll eventually be compelled to block with TiTi to stay alive and 0/4 wall is not a big deal at all (even with Assault Formation and stuff).

That's it for all the brilliant, Captain Obvious conclusions I've made so far. Late-game, that's the word, silly, stupid, whoever-you-think-you-are, mister! Well, I did think that way for some time, that's true. But the statement itself isn't. Looking for a late-game winner, you need a decent win-con of it's own. Ugin, Silumgar, Ulamog, new Sphinx of the Final Word - those are the good examples of what control can take a liking to. No matter - planeswalker or dragon control, all of those have one thing (or "Thing") in common: their win-cons don't need any (or at least - not many) further protection. Planeswalkers - they can defend themselves, even if countered or destroyed there are more of them coming in the no time. Dragons have their synergies and abilities, like the ones of Thunderbreak Regent, Dragonlord Silumgar or Dragonlord Ojutai. Thing in the Ice  ^Flip requires from us casting 4 more spells in order to unleash it's power and to keep it on the board in the meantime. Quite hard goal to achieve in some mirror-like match-up, perhaps easier against RDW... but there simply won't be any late-game with RDW.

You may ask me: "If you hate this card so much (I don't, I love it, actually), why did you buy it yesterday?". Well, most of the reasons are listed in the first paragraph of this article. What is more, I strongly believe, that when control will loose it's dragon win-cons like Ojutai or Silumgar, and Languish (that is currently highly counterproductive for TiTi), Thing in the Ice  ^Flip will find it's place in that kind of deck much easier, with different tempo for removal, board wipe and counter-control. Finally, as a perfect Johnny, I have to believe in some kind of upcoming trick like Vampire Hexmage and Dark Depths, that - in this case - wouldn't be broken enough to make it impossible to occur and to let The Thing...

... become a thing.

Thanks for reading and any comments, I hope for some suggestions about the topics you'd like me to look into in upcoming articles. Until then - see you soon!

Postmortal_Pop says... #2

I quite enjoyed this article and it poses a understandable explication of this facet of standard. Also, the constant movie references were great.

June 1, 2016 11:51 p.m.

PepsiAddicted says... #3

good article, i liked it. and i like the movie references.. in fact you should make that a thing. infinite possibilities... i could see tucker & dale vs evil themed article for a deck with slaughter pact or some kind of sac engine (yeah prolly nothing like that in standard right now, i have no idea)

June 2, 2016 5:25 a.m.

Wiktul says... #4

Thank you for such a positive response :) I will probably take a look into few more standard cards, then I shall move further into older set, but I'm still open to suggestions.

June 2, 2016 4:46 p.m.

Peisistratos says... #5

Hi Wiktul, I appreciated this funny article. I particularly like a point you express in a very fitting way, and which I think is a grain of wisdom and would be useful to be emphasized (especially for Magic players tinkering with Thing in the Ice  ^Flip) : at least a large pool of very strong and cards are needed in order to protect Thing in the Ice  ^Flip, 'feed' it, take care of problematic permanents AND not dying meanwhile; simply, it seems to me that this Standard doesn't meet this requirement (and I don't think Modern or even Legacy could). I could be wrong, but I think this reflection to be a good start.

June 7, 2016 6:24 a.m.

Wiktul says... #6

To be honest, I did consider trying it in my BUG Delver for Legacy and I did some seroius research around that option, but there are still too many "but's" to put it in there. Even with supersonic tempo of legacy cantrips, counterspels and removal, it's still 4 more spells to go, with no immediate impact on the board and very possible Stifle in responce to the flip trigger, that itself could be a little bit counterproductive for our own Tarmogoyf, Deathrite Shaman, Dark Confidant, True-Name Nemesis or Delver of Secrets  ^Flip.

What's even more important, and I think that the level of importancy is equal for Standard and Legacy in this matter, is that Thing in the Ice  ^Flip forces you to make lots of very rash decisions, that otherwise would be made more carefully and with better timing. All in all, we're getting back to my conclusion. I'd rather wait for the Eldritch Moon and new counter/removal tempo to let it reach it's full potential or maybe try it in some modern Grixis, but at this point it's at the very same level of being "almost good" for non-standard formats as Jace, Vryn's Prodigy  ^Flip has been so far.

June 7, 2016 7:56 a.m.