Toying with demon/angel set ideas: input very welcome
Custom Cards forum
Posted on Oct. 14, 2015, 6:56 a.m. by GobboE
So I was toying with some ideas, some classic, some cliche and some with a twist, and I love to have your input. (And I apologize for the large essay I penned down here :) )
The Lore
A Plane, let's call it Tyvar for now I have little inspiration for names, is based on a strong dichotomy of the forces of the Heavens (Angels) and the forces of the Underworld (Demons). These forces are evenly matched, but their survival depends of the amount of faith (souls if you will) they receive from the inhabitants of Tyvar. Needless to say, this generates much animosity among the warring forces.
Because there is an intense trafficking in Angelic/Demonic forces to ensure the inflow of Faith, both sides use massive quantities of (mana fueled) interplanar gates. These (open) gates affect Tyvar heavily. As a result Tyvar has strong tectonical movement (continental drift), causing ruptures and earthquakes. However, while dangerous to the inhabitants, in the end they are no threat to the plane itself. Because the mana is channeled through Souls of the living, it can occur that an area becomes 'exhausted' (no coloured mana) when: all life in a certain area is vanquished, or too much mana is spend, draining the natural resources (and the living, but not killing them).
Both sides think they use a vastly different approach to obtaining the required faith, but in reality not so much. Enter the twist: both opposing sides have schisms and splinter groups, some sort of 'factions'. Yes, most of the Angels are beneficial and do-gooders, but some are nasty and vengeful creatures (think of Archangel Michael and his flaming sword). Most demons are cruel and sadistic, but some aim to increase the independence and self-awareness of the people in the hope these people will reward them with the much needed Faith (think of titan Prometheus). Faction of Militant Angels: Karah, Faction of Friendly Angels: Nas, Faction of Cruel Demons: Akzer, Faction of Independent Demons: Haazmaut, perhaps there are more. In game terms, each faction has four colours aligned with it: Karah 
; Akzer 
, Haazmaut , Nas . is reserved for the alliance the Haazmaut and the Nas are destined to make in order to survive the coming war. For playability Only a very small cycle of legendary leaders will have the four colour spectrum, the rest will have the 'normal' distribution in the set.
Each faction (demon and angel alike) wields influence over several districts, since every faction needs believers. The biggest factions are: the Karah, the Nas, and the demon faction Akzer; the Haamaut are the smallest by a stretch. Summarized, the Karah and the Akzer rule through fear and intimidation (the Karah are a stratocracy - government headed by military chiefs -, Akzer Totalitarian). The Nas and Haazmaut through guidance and support (Nas are more Gerontocratical - ruled by wisdom and elders -, Haazmaut more liberal).
The prime Haazmaut stronghold on Tyvar is hard pressed, besieged by the Karah on one side and the Akzer on the other, they need to find a solution and do something or face the loss of their last great domain (and the loss of much faith).
The leader of the domain is Lord Er-Ivh, a human lord who pays homage to the Haazmaut. His main general is an Imp called 'Vrokk, the Imperator' (with his army of slavish imps) who secretly is bribed by the Akzer to kill the Lord and take over leadership. Er-Ivh is a grumpy, but essentially good ruler who forbade human sacrifices and torture. He is a scholar of the arcane and has a detailed knowledge of the plane and its tectonic movements. He seeks to find a way to harness that power of movement and the gates as a mana source. This research is supported by the Haazmaut who view it as vital to ending the conflict.
Meanwhile the Akzer's ranks have swelled by an influx of Karah Angels who switched sides, due to a long and stealthy operation of the Akzer to weaken the Karah position. The Karah general Guriel is furious, and want to wipe out demonic influence in the entire region. Starting with the crucial and relatively weak Domain of Er-Ivh is, in their eyes, an easy way to obtaining more Faith before attacking the Akzer. However, the Nas sense a shift in power towards the Akzer, due to the corruption of Karah angels, and the growing strength of the Akzer and secretly seek to help the Haazmaut domain from being overrun.
Long story cut short: Vrokk stealthily enters Bleak Castle of Er-Ivh and mortally wounds the Lord. Vrokk claims lordship, but Er-Ivh transcends and becomes the planeswalker the Haazmaut where hoping for. He knows that the only way to truly end the conflict is to provide a different way of mana generation: through the tectonic movements.
A war begins that will put demon against demon, angels against angels and zealot against zealot. But in the end Er-Ivh has to fight the main lords of the Akzer and the Karah without giving the one of the sides to opportunity to overwhelm the battlefield and end the conflict with them triumphant.
(thanks for reading my essay so far ;) )
Mechanics
I like to reflect the changing environment, the constant struggle and building tension. I chose for charge counters, for synergy with other charge counter cards, and because it seemed such a nice fit. Menace is definitely cut out for this set.
Devotion [creature type]: [this creature] costs (1) less for each [creature type] you control
Affiliation [creature type]: When ~ enters the battlefield, the next [creature type] you play this turn costs 
less to cast
Lastly, the ability 'Exhaustion' renders one of your basic mana producing lands colourless in exchange for an effect.
Card suggestions
Er-Ivh, The Bleak Sovereign
Legendary creature Human , Mythic
: Put a -1/-1 counter on target creature. Put a +1/+1 counter on another target creature and it gains haste
2/2
The Bleak Castle
Legendary Land, Rare
Add 
to your mana pool
, target creature gains Shroud until end of turn, that creature deals damage to you equal to its Strength
Er-Ivh, Defiant Shaper
Planeswalker, Mythic
White, Blue, Black, Red, Green, White
+1 Add a mana of any colour to your mana pool, your mana pool does not empty as steps or phases end until your next upkeep
+2 All players draw two cards, your opponents discard one card
0 Tap target permanent, it does not untap during the next untap phase
-2 Target land becomes a basic land of your choice
-9 Each player exiles all enchantments, artifacts and creatures
5 loyalty
Death Field 
Enchantment, Rare
Exhaustion 2: Destroy target non-land permanent
Vrokk The Imperator
Legendary creature Imp , Rare
Flying
Other imps you control have +1/+1 and menace
2/3
Shifting of the Tectonic Plates
Enchantment, , Rare
During your upkeep each player sacrifices a land, and you put a charge counter on Tectonic Plates. If you have three or more charge counters on ~ sacrifice ~, it deals damage to players and creatures without flying equal to the number of charge counters, this damage cannot be prevented.
Angel of Disease
Creature Angel, , Rare
Flying
Affiliation: Demons
During your upkeep put a charge counter on ~ and ~ deals damage to all creatures equal to the number of charge counters
(Flavor text: She should be called the Angel of Pestilence)
3/3
Burning Imp
Creature Imp, , common
Devotion Imps
Sacrifice an imp: deal 1 damage to target creature
1/2
Guriel, Stratocrat Viceroy
Legendary Angel , , Rare
Menace, Flying, Vigilance
When ~ attacks, attacking creatures get +2 / +0
When ~ blocks, attacking creatures get -2 / +0
5/4
Salvation Guide
Creature Angel,
White, uncommon
Flying
Devotion Humans
2/3
Callous Cultist
Human cleric, 
Red, uncommon
Affiliation Demons
Whenever ~ enters the battlefield demons and creatures with affiliation demons get: ' deal one damage to target creature or player' until end of turn
1/1
Gatherer of Souls
Elf cleric,
Green, White, Uncommon
Affiliation Angels
Whenever ~ comes into play Angels get 'whenever a creature damaged by this creature goes to the graveyard exile it instead', until end of turn
2/2
Cards like: Belbe's Portal, Cryptic Gateway or Planar Portal would fit in, perhaps even Planar Gate
And: Much kudos to Boza for his help!!
Hey thanks, that's is a great idea greenkingwashere.
I will put it in, thanks for readinn through all this
October 14, 2015 7:29 a.m.
khachuchrianz says... #4
Hey like the idea and the lore!
Lord of bleak castle breaks the color pie. His ability as is seems a bit green. Black never has a way to get rid of emchantments. So maybe make this guy BG?
October 14, 2015 8:30 a.m.
I read through the essay and I throughly enjoyed the lore - general setting is cliche, but serves the purpose, but with names like Vrokk the Imperator (100% flavor win! Homerun! Touchdown!), I was sold.
Then I scrolled down to the cards and mechanics and they raised some eyebrows.
Color pie violations and (severe) bending, overcosting and undercosting, 5-color planeswalkers that do nothing (besides being flavorful), using abandoned magic mechanics (affinity and lords that affect themselves), making ability words (affiliation) that should be creature types, why do angels or demons NOT have affiliation for angels or demons, but tribal affinity instead...
A lot of mechanical problems are present, though lore is quite fine. Solution is to bring on board someone who can handle mechanical stuff, while you feed that person lore to create cards.
ALERT: BLATANT SELF-APPLICATION DETECTED!
For example, you need to rework affiliation and tribe affinity. It does not make sense that members of the respective tribe do not have affiliation to it.
- Use/rework old mechanics - bring back/rework Devotion. For example, tribe affinity can simply be devotion -
Salvation Guide 3W
Creature Angel
Uncommon
Flying
This card cost X less, where X is your devotion to white.
2/3
Much less strain on the card and the set as a whole. Not to mention that in order to support tribe affinity as is, you need 1 CMC angels, which is NOT what you want to do to iconic creatures.
- Affiliation - this is currently Rally, but limited to a specific creature type that is affected, an problem with Allies in the original Zendikar, which Rally attempts to solve. Repeating past mistakes (parasitic mechanics) is not desirable when making a new set. The easiest solution is to use the unnamed dragon mechanic from DTK. For example:
Callous Cultist 2R
Human cleric - uncommon
As an additional cost to cast ~, you may reveal a Demon card from your hand.
If you revealed a Demon card or controlled a Demon as you cast ~, creatures you control gain 'Tap, deal 1 damage to target creature or player' until end of turn.
1/1
There is no need to reinvent the wheel for every set.
October 14, 2015 8:38 a.m.
@ khachuchrianz : Hmm, yes I think you are right. Thanks for the input. Have changed it :)
October 15, 2015 3:09 a.m.
@ Boza : It worked, you are hired! :)
Let's start at the beginning.It is a bit cliche. I aimed for recognition and flavor, but with a twist (the requirement of souls/faith vs the various factions). I wanted to present a classic setting in a fresh(er) way, by focusing on one event taking place in this greater scheme of things (the assassination of the Lord of Bleak Castle) and how it influences everything. Still the lore does need some more work.
Indeed, there is indeed some blatant breaking of the colour pie. Sorry about that. I was more involved in flavour than in the mechanics, I should have payed more attention. Tried to fix most of it in the above examples. The planeswalker still needs some work, I think (as does the cmc of cards).
I am indeed terrible at mechanics.
I have considered Devotion, but it did not seem right. I wanted certain creatures to have affiliation with a certain type of creatures as opposed to a certain colour. This to reflect the various factions and opposing views. But I also wanted the creatures to remain playable after the 'set's' rotation. hence I came up with re-using the old ability of 'Affinity' which seemed more of a fit, since the original affinity was 'triggered' by a certain type of card on the battlefield (artifacts, swamps, etc). Lorwyn's tribal oriented set seemed to have some elements I needed too, so aimed to combine those two: affinity and the tribal.
Still you are right, the terms need rephrasing, there is no need to reinvent the wheel. Perhaps something like:
Devotion [creature type]: [this creature] costs less for each [creature type] you control
Affiliation [creature type]: When ~ enters the battlefield, the next [creature type] you play this turn costs less to cast
October 15, 2015 4:11 a.m.
"Devotion [creature type]: [this creature] costs 1 less for each [creature type] you control"
This is Affinity for [creature type]. It has the exact same problem as devotion - it does not serve the flavor since "both opposing sides have schisms and splinter groups, some sort of 'factions'." If you have Affinity for Angels, do you like both the good and the mischievous ones? Probably not.
"Affiliation [creature type]: When ~ enters the battlefield, the next [creature type] you play this turn costs 2 less to cast"
Acolyte or Herald would be more on point for this one.
This might give you some ideas: http://www.mtgsalvation.com/forums/creativity/custom-card-creation/639465-iconic-fatties-in-their-allied-colors
October 15, 2015 5:41 a.m.
I'll post my disclaimer here :) (and removed it from the bulk of text above)
-I like the sets which have a great, bulk of lore to support the cards. Yes, I am one of those guys who loved the Dragons of Tarkir set for its story lines and twists and the Innistrat set left me dreaming of Chtulhu for months. Not to disrespect (I mean, I love a good epic showdown too) the new Zendikar blocks will (hopefully) be epic, but it will also basically be a fight of good versus evil. Also, I think an elaborate lore and tribal often go hand in hand.
greenkingwashere says... #2
Maybe you could add something like an Alignment mechanic. It would be something like "Alignment to demons", and would give a bonus to all demons AND others with alignment to demons
October 14, 2015 7:06 a.m.